What's the oddest thing you've seen in real life?

spongy · Feb 6, 2013

Philzo-93 said:
Once saw an elderly gentleman give a kid £20 to go on the see-saw with him. Very well known in Burgess Hill, Jeffrey's his name. Albion fan too.

Has a mental problem that makes him have a child-like mind!

I know Jeffrey, he is practically stalking my missus at the minute. He comes into the TopHouse EVERY DAY to see if she's working.

It was sweet at first but now it's getting a bit out of hand. Some of things he comes out with to her are bordering on the weirder side of perverse. And we have no idea how to deal with it.

Pretty pink fairy · Feb 6, 2013

Brightonia said:
Weirdest thing I saw was in Amsterdam in '07, a midget and a black man were having a full on row in the middle of the red light district, all of a sudden the black guy picked up the midget and threw him over the bridge and into the canal! I was utterly gob smacked!

Also in Amsterdam I was in a pub with the lads and a man came up to the window which we were sitting by with a plant pot on his head, he stood there for about half an hour starring at us before my mate went outside and smashed the pot of his head, he disappeared and came back about an hour later with another plant pot on his head!

By far the strangest place I've ever been!

i thought you were going to say you see a black man shagging a midget in Amsterdam

regards
Das Reich

Hillian1 · Feb 6, 2013

spongy said:
I know Jeffrey, he is practically stalking my missus at the minute. He comes into the TopHouse EVERY DAY to see if she's working.

It was sweet at first but now it's getting a bit out of hand. Some of things he comes out with to her are bordering on the weirder side of perverse. And we have no idea how to deal with it.

He's harmless mate, I've known Jeffrey for years.

He needs to be told, firmly, not to do what he's doing and he'll stop it. He used to come into my local and talk to every single lady one by one. The landlord told him to behave or he wouldn't be allowed back and he's fine.

Edit: He does need reminding every now and then.

Brightonia · Feb 6, 2013

Pretty pink fairy said:
i thought you were going to say you see a black man shagging a midget in Amsterdam
regards
Das Reich

Saw some sex shows but nothing that weird!!! Although nearly had my eye out in the banana bar, those girls are talented!!!

Camicus · Feb 6, 2013

Driving through Llanberis and saw a woman with a broken leg in plaster on crutches with a roller blade on the other foot and a jack russel on a lead

northseagull · Feb 6, 2013

After the Brighton Bristol Play off final in Cardiff, me an a mate went back to our hotel, to be greeted by a pissed Welsh bloke in the bar; cock out, with a flower sticking out the end.

Philzo-93 · Feb 6, 2013

spongy said:
I know Jeffrey, he is practically stalking my missus at the minute. He comes into the TopHouse EVERY DAY to see if she's working.

It was sweet at first but now it's getting a bit out of hand. Some of things he comes out with to her are bordering on the weirder side of perverse. And we have no idea how to deal with it.

You can't really do much about it, unless you know someone that is good at handling these things. He does come out with some really odd stuff but the guy is harmless.

EDIT: I also thought he was barred from every pub because of this. Except for the one by Manor Field school...

dale jasper football guru · Feb 7, 2013

Saw this dog out in a bar at Rochester,Michigan on a Christmas pub crawl !!!

hopkins · Feb 7, 2013

Frutos said:
A pitch invasion after a football match in Ireland which included the utterly bizarre sight of two grown men (one supporter of each team) essentially sword fighting with umbrellas in the centre circle with various other, shall we say more traditional, battles going on around them.

Thats Brilliant :lolol:

HovaGirl · Feb 7, 2013

banjo said:
Did you say sorry ?

Yes! Another time I was walking along Western Road, looking at the pavement (as I always do, on the lookout for dogshit) when I bumped into someone and apologised. It was my Dad, and he'd deliberately aimed for me!

- - - Updated - - -

Sompting_Seagull · Feb 7, 2013

Frutos said:
A pitch invasion after a football match in Ireland which included the utterly bizarre sight of two grown men (one supporter of each team) essentially sword fighting with umbrellas in the centre circle with various other, shall we say more traditional, battles going on around them.

Quality, can i borrow that...

Frutos · Feb 7, 2013

Sompting_Seagull said:
Quality, can i borrow that...

What do you need to borrow it for?

Bevendean Hillbilly · Feb 7, 2013

HovaGirl said:
Yes! Another time I was walking along Western Road, looking at the pavement (as I always do, on the lookout for dogshit) when I bumped into someone and apologised. It was my Dad

- - - Updated - - -

Was he out collecting Dogshit as well? That's the sort of hobby that only families can share.

SeagullSongs · Feb 8, 2013

Frutos said:
A pitch invasion after a football match in Ireland which included the utterly bizarre sight of two grown men (one supporter of each team) essentially sword fighting with umbrellas in the centre circle with various other, shall we say more traditional, battles going on around them.

Can I ask, was it like fencing or more of a longsword-style encounter?

Doc Lynam · Feb 8, 2013

SeagullSongs said:
Can I ask, was it like fencing or more of a longsword-style encounter?

But with Umbrellas

SeagullSongs · Feb 8, 2013

Doc Lynam said:
But with Umbrellas

What a terrible scene :lolol:

bn1&bn3 Albion · Feb 8, 2013

My jaw hurts from laughing so much :lolol:

Got chased by a crazy homeless guy with a kids foam baseball bat because my friends sneeze woke him up..

The Fifth Column · Feb 8, 2013

In the 90s when I was in the Navy we were docked in Corfu, a body was found trapped and floating between the ship and the jetty and by all accounts was an Albanian woman who had tried to somehow make it over across from the mainland. I was tasked along with a few others to recover the body and it was rotten and bloated and really nasty. We didn't have any specialist equipment so just slung an old cargo net underneath her and attached it to a boat winch to hoist her up. As I engaged the winch and she got halfway up her head separated from the body, rolled out of the cargo net and plopped back into the water! This was met with a chorus of whoooooaaaas from the few dozen other sailors gathered watching. It got worse though as her head was closely followed by one of her arms and half a leg which clung on for a few seconds as the foot got caught, it was bloody stinking by this stage as what was left of her blackened and purple corpse slopped onto the deck. I left at that stage to spew over the ships side and left the medics to pour her into a body bag. it was more gruesome than odd but still a very strange thing to witness.

brightn'ove · Feb 8, 2013

The Fifth Column said:
In the 90s when I was in the Navy we were docked in Corfu, a body was found trapped and floating between the ship and the jetty and by all accounts was an Albanian woman who had tried to somehow make it over across from the mainland. I was tasked along with a few others to recover the body and it was rotten and bloated and really nasty. We didn't have any specialist equipment so just slung an old cargo net underneath her and attached it to a boat winch to hoist her up. As I engaged the winch and she got halfway up her head separated from the body, rolled out of the cargo net and plopped back into the water! This was met with a chorus of whoooooaaaas from the few dozen other sailors gathered watching. It got worse though as her head was closely followed by one of her arms and half a leg which clung on for a few seconds as the foot got caught, it was bloody stinking by this stage as what was left of her blackened and purple corpse slopped onto the deck. I left at that stage to spew over the ships side and left the medics to pour her into a body bag. it was more gruesome than odd but still a very strange thing to witness.

Well, thats my nightmares sorted for tonight. :thumbsup:

The Fifth Column · Feb 8, 2013

brightn'ove said:
Well, thats my nightmares sorted for tonight.

I won't tell you about the time I walked into a fly ridden cluttered flat in the middle of a hot August and put my boot through the chest cavity of the dead occupant who was so decomposed I hadn't noticed him there amongst all the other debris, as I removed my boot it came out with several hundred maggots all over it. I was very very sick. Sleep well :lolol:

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