Can I put my dead dog in green bin outside ?

[Uncle Spielberg]

Sorry but I feel a visit from the spelling checker is required.

Sorry for your loss and completely agree with your sentiments. (Even though it is a really funny thread and I really hope the OP was having a laugh) BUT IT IS BEAR not BARE!!!!

Fair enough. The thread has some humour so I have no problem with it.

 

[vegster]

I need a small bathroom suite to go in there for the mice. Now they have their little station they're well set. They have been ripping up cotton buds that had fallen behind the shelves. I'd let them stay really if it was up to me but my wife is not keen on them. I like the idea of adding to the station though with some small plastic trees and that.

I can understand that the Mrs is upset by the presence of Mice, in the early morning gloom it's easy to grab a Mouse instead of a Tampax by mistake.

 

[Brighton TID]

Flush it down the toilet, like a goldfish.

 

[TSB]

Having a patio didn't stop Fred West.

Ahh man, I have smile pain

 

[HAILSHAM SEAGULL]

Flush it down the toilet, like a goldfish.

What the dog?
If rigor has set in it wont go round the S bend

 

[Barrel of Fun]

Where's you bin?

Er... Nowhere.

Where's you wheelie bin?

OK. Outside putting the dog out to recycle.

 

[Grapes of Wrath]

A brilliant and funny thread which has made me laugh.....mostly, thanks guys.

Also quite informative, whilst I don't have a dog at the moment, when i do and that horrible day arrives, I will at least have some new options to consider for its disposal!

 

[TopCat]

Pick a neighbour you don't like, then a stealthy introduction under their car as they pass could lead to a number of results depending on depth of dislike for them. Guilt-tripping them into paying for an Uncle S-style sendoff, lawsuit for 'emotional damage' or maybe a careless driving charge?

 

[Brighton TID]

What the dog?
If rigor has set in it wont go round the S bend

It'll be fine, trust me.

 

[Psychobilly freakout]

I have just had a quick look through the OP list of other threads started and some are very worrying concerning the fate of this poor dog, if you take into account one such thread " is it ok to re heat Chinese"

 

[Bry Nylon]

"My dog's got no nose."
"How does he smell?"
No, really - he's got no nose. The vet cut it off with a bow saw to fit him in the incinerator."

 

[Grombleton]

It'll be fine, trust me.

That implies you have previous experience of shoehorning various animals into plumbing. Are you like a sadistic Mario? What the hell is in your toilet? Just a cat or have you managed to plunge something like a Manatee as well?

Worrying behaviour.

 

[m20gull]

If its got decent rigor mortis then surely you could use it as a combination stick/treat for your dog ? Using the tail as a lever will obviously get some distance on it when you throw it.

On another occasion one of the dogs did come running out of the woods carrying a completely stiff squirrel like a stick. Never occurred to me to throw it.

 

[Psychobilly freakout]

On another occasion one of the dogs did come running out of the woods carrying a completely stiff squirrel like a stick. Never occurred to me to throw it.

No of course you didn't ......

But you do have a lovely novelty nut dispenser now don't you.

 

[Questions]

I can understand that the Mrs is upset by the presence of Mice, in the early morning gloom it's easy to grab a Mouse instead of a Tampax by mistake.

That could prove fatal surely ? What a way to kill a poor little mouse.

 

[banjo]

Nothing to do with this thread but reminded Me of this tongue twister. Ken Dodds dads dogs dead.

 

[Grombleton]

Ken Dodds dads dogs dead.

Oh no! Someone should break the news to Ken.

 

[vegster]

On another occasion one of the dogs did come running out of the woods carrying a completely stiff squirrel like a stick. Never occurred to me to throw it.

Option 2, Carefully shave off the fur from the last 4" of tail and then insert your stiffened Squirrel tail first in the ground alongside a garden plant of your choice, from a short distance it will seem like a Squirrel is running up one of your Gladioli, Iris or similar.

 

[Bry Nylon]

Ken Dodds dads dogs dead.

That'll be the Kop covered in flowers then, and Everton shirts and half n' half scarves hanging off the Shankly Gates.

 

[Barrel of Fun]

Oh no! Someone should break the news to Ken.

He already knows. A taxidermist cocked up and the only salvageable part of Fluffy was his tail and Ken uses that in his routine.