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[Misc] Parents and memories..



Weststander

Well-known member
NSC Patron
Aug 25, 2011
67,993
Withdean area
Memories are so important and define us as people, mine are not of my parents but of important people who have passed who meant the world to me some friends taken far to early leaving families themselves or my auntie and especially my gran, who looked after me until they could not anymore through ill health (cancer) god i miss her so much, and i wave & blow her a kiss to her every time i drive past Hove cemetery.

Making memories for my daughter is the most important thing in the world, for her to know someone will always be there for her and love her no matter what. That is one of the reasons I no longer have a season ticket, she is in breakfast and after school clubs, the only time we see her to spend quality time is the weekend, so I pick and choose games, my daughter is more important.

I just bloody hope she appreciates it....

Take Care Mr Clamp

I remember well your earlier posts about family. Sounds like you’re making a great job of being a parent. Many of us now are gentler and more attentive to our own kids that what we knew, something my Dad’s noticed. Progress!
 




pearl

Well-known member
May 3, 2016
13,100
Behind My Eyes
My dad at football (Partick Thistle aka The Maryhill Magyars) when I was a wee boy just being weaned into being a junior Jag. Bloke in front of him on the terraces put his umbrella up. Twice my dad asked him politely to put his umbrella down as we couldn't see tbe game. Twice he was met with a slurred torrent of abuse. He didn't ask a third time. Instead he got his lighter out and torched the damn thing :lol:

Excellent! What a great memory, did you tell your mum?
 


pearl

Well-known member
May 3, 2016
13,100
Behind My Eyes
Sorry if this is morbid, I mean it more as a celebration of my late parents.
So today is the 5th anniversary of my Father’s passing and also what would have been my late Mother’s birthday. On the way back from my night shift I dropped into church and lit two candles for Cath and Bill.
I don’t feel sad, I feel reflective.
I hadn’t seen my Dad for 30 years. Got back in touch and he was dying. We had 18 months to get to know one another again and we really had a good time. Going to all the places we visited when I was a kid and catching up. We had a short but good time together .
I’m feeling the need for positive things today.
What good times will you or did you remember with your folks and what good times and memories will you create with your children?
I mean this to be a positive thread.
TC

P.S I’m back from night shift , bed beckons so don’t be offended if I go silent.

Great thread TC! My mum died suddenly in her sleep 7 years + 11 months ago today and it was a Thursday, it was a nasty shock for everyone. Strangely, I was thinking about my dad yesterday. I really didn't appreciate what a sweet guy he was, a quiet, easy going Irishman. He died from cancer in 1985, way too young.
I used to get annoyed with him because if we were out anywhere he would stop and talk to everyone and anyone (seriously). I find myself doing the same these days only I speak to animals too! :rolleyes:
 


Eeyore

Colonel Hee-Haw of Queen's Park
NSC Patron
Apr 5, 2014
25,570
My Dad died in April. The previous season I had written a reflective piece around the Wolves away game.

https://brightonlines.wordpress.com/2017/04/16/are-we-there-yet/

Losing my final parent has hit me hard and been a trigger for anxiety and depression. The good news is that I don't feel uncomfortable talking about it. Folk are a lot more sensitive to it these days. It's common.
 


Philzo-93

Well-known member
Jan 17, 2009
2,797
North Stand
Not my folks, but my girlfriend's Dad and I were very close. I was welcomed to their house from day dot and he was always happy to give me one of his beers whenever we watched the football together. He was a great man.

He loved his football a lot and though he was an Arsenal fan he loved the Albion and always watched games on the screen. When I see him afterwards he would talk loads about how great Bruno is and spoke a lot of football knowledge that I never picked up on. I enjoyed that a lot.

I was blessed to get him tickets to the Wigan and later celebrated when Huddersfield drew. I promised him I would do my best to get a ticket for the Arsenal match (home or away). Sadly, I never got that opportunity - he died after suffering complications from an operation to remove a tumour in his liver over the summer. **** cancer.

I managed to go to both Arsenal games and, weirdly, there was an empty seat next to me at both matches. On another day, I probably would've blubbered like a baby but I stood there, smiled, looked up and thought "you always find a bloody way". I knew he would've loved last season and even more so beating United to stay up.

Wherever he may be right now, I know he would be ranting and raving about Dunk and Murray. Probably reminiscing about that dink over De Gea too.
 




Thunder Bolt

Silly old bat
My dad at football (Partick Thistle aka The Maryhill Magyars) when I was a wee boy just being weaned into being a junior Jag. Bloke in front of him on the terraces put his umbrella up. Twice my dad asked him politely to put his umbrella down as we couldn't see tbe game. Twice he was met with a slurred torrent of abuse. He didn't ask a third time. Instead he got his lighter out and torched the damn thing :lol:

I'd better be more careful waving my scarf round at the Amex!
 


Thunder Bolt

Silly old bat
My Dad was really disappointed I wasn't a boy especially when the marriage broke down, leaving me as his only child. He took me to the Goldstone and to cricket, which taught me to love both, as I cherished the times we had together when he was home on leave. I even followed him into the Navy. He wasn't the best Dad in the world, but I knew he loved me in his own way. Sadly he died in 1998, so didn't see the Albion rehomed, so when we played Doncaster, and the teams came out to Sussex by the Sea, I had tears streaming down my face, like a baby.

I miss the old fella.
 


crabface

Well-known member
Mar 24, 2012
1,882
I am lucky that i still have both my parents, so feel for all of you who have lost yours.

I try to make the most of the time with my parents as you never know when it will be cut short. My mum unfortunatly suffered a series of strokes 5 years ago now, leaving her the shadow of the person she was. I often think back to the times before and wish it was like it used to be not just for me but for her. I know now to enjoy every moment i get to spend with her though, wether its sitting down and going through key stage one English books with her whilst she tries to learn to write again or while she is desperatly trying to tell me something and the words that she wants not coming out meaning she is getting more and more frustrated. Just going for a walk with her, even if its very slow is cherished.
 




Sorry if this is morbid, I mean it more as a celebration of my late parents.
So today is the 5th anniversary of my Father’s passing and also what would have been my late Mother’s birthday. On the way back from my night shift I dropped into church and lit two candles for Cath and Bill.
I don’t feel sad, I feel reflective.
I hadn’t seen my Dad for 30 years. Got back in touch and he was dying. We had 18 months to get to know one another again and we really had a good time. Going to all the places we visited when I was a kid and catching up. We had a short but good time together .
I’m feeling the need for positive things today.
What good times will you or did you remember with your folks and what good times and memories will you create with your children?
I mean this to be a positive thread.
TC

P.S I’m back from night shift , bed beckons so don’t be offended if I go silent.
Those holidays down Cornwall and Devon in the VW:rolleyes:
 

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Tribunal Alta

New member
Aug 13, 2018
9
Back in the day
As others have said, always cherish the memories and take care of yourself today.

I lost my mum a week before my 13th Birthday - people say ' that must have been hard for you' - maybe, but it was a lot harder for her - the most wonderful, funny, forgetful, caring, sensitive, absent-minded person I've ever met. She wasn't even 40.

I have fantastic memories of her.

I think about her, and my dad who I lost 10 years ago, pretty much every day.

Well done Mr G, made me laugh that. People always say the same to me!! What you need to do is take a month of work and walk the Camino de Santiago!!
H
 


Best Foot Forward

Active member
Apr 29, 2008
198
Burgess Hill
My Dad died 15 years ago. He took me to my first game at the Goldstone back in 1972, and as a result I have been an Albion fan ever since. I think of him every time I visit the Amex, and my boys are now season ticket holders with me.
 




Chicken Run

Member Since Jul 2003
NSC Patron
Jul 17, 2003
19,490
Valley of Hangleton
As context, my Dad was a diver in the RN , spent his time in the Falklands retrieving bodies, from both sides, from the sea. Mum was a nurse Fromm Belfast on the Falls Road treating anyone that came in. English or Irish. They saw some stuff that couple.
Apologies, bit of a day for me.

Good people your parents and good that you have wonderful memories of them.
 


sydney

tinky ****in winky
Jul 11, 2003
17,961
town full of eejits
memories of my dad , f a cup finals , boiled ham sandwiches and bottles of mackesons , watching Alan Minter and John Conteh fights and Frank Bruno of course , my old man boxed for the Army , watching the snooker tilt small hours with the sound turned right down so we didn't wake the old girl up, driving over to midweek night games at the Goldstone in his work van , working with him up in Ealing ,Tooting & Brixton in the late 70's Early 80's , an eye opener for a 12 year old from Worthing.

His funeral was a rollercoaster ....read the Eulogy , said my own words , Findon Crem packed to the doors...6 of his commando pals came , they were fantastic old buggers.

it doesn't hurt anymore when i think of him but it did for along time.

my mum is still alive .

Chin up mate ....all the best.
 
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dejavuatbtn

Well-known member
Aug 4, 2010
7,519
Henfield
Last saw my dad when I was about 4 and by the time I had been able to chase him down he had been dead for a number of years. Not only did I miss out on a father, my own kids would have been in their teens when he was still alive and he never had a chance to know of them or see them. I traced him through a cousin whose mother (his brother’s wife) had looked after him in his old age. He had a picture of me as a toddler on his mantelpiece all his life and I was given it and some of his effects by this cousin.
My mum had left him - she is still alive and I think now regrets cutting my ties with him.
Thought I’d share this because you don’t know what you’ve got ‘til it’s gone, and once it’s gone, it could be forever.
 




Harry Wilson's tackle

Harry Wilson's Tackle
NSC Patron
Oct 8, 2003
54,935
Faversham
Sorry if this is morbid, I mean it more as a celebration of my late parents.
So today is the 5th anniversary of my Father’s passing and also what would have been my late Mother’s birthday. On the way back from my night shift I dropped into church and lit two candles for Cath and Bill.
I don’t feel sad, I feel reflective.
I hadn’t seen my Dad for 30 years. Got back in touch and he was dying. We had 18 months to get to know one another again and we really had a good time. Going to all the places we visited when I was a kid and catching up. We had a short but good time together .
I’m feeling the need for positive things today.
What good times will you or did you remember with your folks and what good times and memories will you create with your children?
I mean this to be a positive thread.
TC

P.S I’m back from night shift , bed beckons so don’t be offended if I go silent.

Brilliant thread. Perfect antidote to the low-grade hate elswhere on NSC today. I never got on with my dad but he wrote me a wonderful letter in his perfect script, with a fountain pen, shortly before he died. Not an apology for his being a relentless contrarian and bully, which would have been insincere, but some proud praise for a bit of my success. I occasionally read it and allow myself a half-smile. I'd like to hope that my boy thinks better of me. Ironically (or not) I'd sacrifice that affection in an instant in exchange for him enjoying a better life than he currently has.
 


The Antikythera Mechanism

The oldest known computer
NSC Patron
Aug 7, 2003
8,021
I was chatting to my dad one day about what happens after you die and he said that, although he didn’t believe in reincarnation, he did believe that we all live on through our children, grandchildren and so on. It’s been nearly 29 years since he died at far too young an age, but when I look in the mirror and at my sons and grandchildren, I can see him.
 




The Clamp

Well-known member
NSC Patron
Jan 11, 2016
25,723
West is BEST
Just got to reading through all your great posts. Thank you , it has lifted my spirits. NSC, not a bad bunch really are ya!
 




The Clamp

Well-known member
NSC Patron
Jan 11, 2016
25,723
West is BEST
I was chatting to my dad one day about what happens after you die and he said that, although he didn’t believe in reincarnation, he did believe that we all live on through our children, grandchildren and so on. It’s been nearly 29 years since he died at far too young an age, but when I look in the mirror and at my sons and grandchildren, I can see him.

Like all energy, life force continues through.
 


The Clamp

Well-known member
NSC Patron
Jan 11, 2016
25,723
West is BEST
My Dad died in April. The previous season I had written a reflective piece around the Wolves away game.

https://brightonlines.wordpress.com/2017/04/16/are-we-there-yet/

Losing my final parent has hit me hard and been a trigger for anxiety and depression. The good news is that I don't feel uncomfortable talking about it. Folk are a lot more sensitive to it these days. It's common.

April is no time ago. I hope you find a way through the anxiety and depression. Losing my parents and older brother a couple of months later triggered anxiety in me too. The thought that the big safety nets had dropped hit me hard. Take care.
 


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