Ever Fancied Owning Your Own Football Club? - Here's Your Chance...

[Trigger]

Oxford chairman Firoz Kassam has revealed he is considering selling the club for a pound.

Kassam, who bought the debt-ridden club for the same token sum four years ago, is becoming increasingly fed up with the fans' lack of support and trust.

He told BBC Radio Oxford: "If only the fans knew what I had to go through on a day-to-day basis they would be shocked.

"But they've got a beautiful stadium there, nobody can take that away from them.

"They've got a good team and they're playing well and that's what matters to the fans.

"So I've done what I've promised to the supporters. I think I've delivered that and whether I see them through and carry them forward or somebody else does it shouldn't really matter."

You dont need any money to own a club, just ask a dick

 

[bigc]

i'll buy them!lol

 

[ben andrews' girlfriend]

north stand chat as a whole could run them!!

 

[Lady Whistledown]

A quid? That makes Guy Butters look positively extravagant at a fiver.

 

[Kenhead]

lets all put a penny in and raise enough to buy them!!

 

[Lady Whistledown]

easy lads, don't rush in and offer the asking price straight away, they'll think we were born yesterday.

I say we offer 64p and tell them to take it or leave it.

 

[Kenhead]

good idea edna k!!

 

[Biscuit]

right, if your voting 64p...im voting 65p! That should swing it.

 

[Lady Whistledown]

I could stretch to 65p I reckon, but don't let on to Kassam or he'll think we're prepared to negotiate.

We could buy them, take down their stadium and reassemble it in a nearby field- say, Falmer- using the spare seats from Withdean to fill the gap from the missing fourth stand.

65p is a bargain for a new stadium, even a three sided one.

 

[Storer68]

I can offer you 56.25p for the whole club..............

 

[Lady Whistledown]

..and a stadium in Toads Hole Valley no doubt...

 

[Dunkstar]

they're not worth more than 10p

 

[Kenhead]

i give 54p

 

[Storer68]

..and a stadium in Toads Hole Valley no doubt...

done.

and I'll thow in the colouring pencils for the retail development for free, can't say fairer than that!

 

[Lady Whistledown]

...so ok then, we buy Oxford for £56.25, nick their stadium, then sell the land in Oxford for around £5 million, and wait for someone else to sell it on a year later for four times the amount we got for it.

Is that how it works? Maybe we could make Oxford groundshare in, say, Ipswich while we look for a pipedream new stadium, and later return them to the local Oxford speedway track for years.

 

[Lord Bracknell]

If it's gonna work, edna, you'd need to appoint a shrewd Chief Executive.

Preferably a local councillor somewhere (obviously not Oxford). There's a bloke called Dave living down in Bath who might be interested. He'll do what he's told.

 

[WATFORD O]

is £1.00 more than you'd get for bha..............at least we got a fiver!

 

[Wilts]

Hmm... buy Oxford United.

I would buy take out £20m worth of debt to fund a Robert Maxwell Memorial Stand where there is currently a big space. It would hold 45,000 (empty of course) and would simply have a big picture of his head across the seats with the message "I'm watching" beneath it.

Then I'd go around and turn the seats around so that everyone faces away from the pitch. Then paint the seats pink and change the nickname from "The Ox" to "We're All Gay, Y'know".

Then disband the club, let it go into liquidation, and use the ground (now repossessed) for Reading reserves.

Then blow up Oxford itself... and that'll do for now. Anything else would just be cruel.