Constipation

[Hatman1234]

Ok, this is my first thread. So I thought I'd talk shit. And give you a break from rubbish transfer rumours.

I just went 4 whole days without passing stools. It was agony, I constantly needed a poo without anything ever happening, with a really bad stomach ache.

I am so pleased to inform, I have just come off the toilet after a 40 minute tug of war, and delivered a beautiful ass baby. I tell you, it was huge, head was well out the water and smelt of sewage - what a relief. I feel 8 stone lighter. I should have stuck a flag on it.

It made me wonder if anyone has gone longer than 4 days.

 

[Djmiles]

It smelt of sewage? What the f*** have you been eating?

 

[fire&skill]

In future, go for the Mathematician Method. Sit down and work it out with a pencil.

That joke was brought to you from the year 1974.

 

[Hatman1234]

It smelt of sewage? What the f*** have you been eating?

A lot of spice, fibre and fruit.

Yeah, the smell confused me a little too. Anything sat in a warm moist airless environment is bound to smell bad, not mentioning the fact it came out my ass!

 

[grubbyhands]

Can I tell a poo joke?
2 japanese sewer workers have done the same job for over 30 years,side by side, pitchforking turds along in the dark Tokyo sewerage system. In all that time they have never spoken to eachother. One night they happen to strike up a conversation to discover that they only live a couple of streets from one another. Turned out they were just 2 nips that passed in the shite.

 

[Hatman1234]

Can I tell a poo joke?
2 japanese sewer workers have done the same job for over 30 years,side by side, pitchforking turds along in the dark Tokyo sewerage system. In all that time they have never spoken to eachother. One night they happen to strike up a conversation to discover that they only live a couple of streets from one another. Turned out they were just 2 nips that passed in the shite.

You're right, that was a shit joke!

 

[catfish]

Ok, this is my first thread. So I thought I'd talk shit. And give you a break from rubbish transfer rumours.

I just went 4 whole days without passing stools. It was agony, I constantly needed a poo without anything ever happening, with a really bad stomach ache.

I am so pleased to inform, I have just come off the toilet after a 40 minute tug of war, and delivered a beautiful ass baby. I tell you, it was huge, head was well out the water and smelt of sewage - what a relief. I feel 8 stone lighter. I should have stuck a flag on it.

It made me wonder if anyone has gone longer than 4 days.

I have to use Dihydrocodeine sometimes and that bungs you up something awful. I've found the extra strength Senokot shifts it although it does put up a good fight.

 

[Captain Sensible]

My god, I honestly don't think anything stays in my bowels more than 12 hrs! I mean it's undigested stuff that comes out. I could probably shit back on a plate what I've just eaten 10hrs earlier?!