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[Misc] Christmas and mental health...the annual thread



Guinness Boy

Tofu eating wokerati
Helpful Moderator
NSC Licker Extraordinaire
Jul 23, 2003
33,420
Up and Coming Sunny Portslade
Seriously glad for you but a little more empathy for those who have clearly admitted to not feeling anywhere near as good about life or the up and coming holidays as you do would not go amiss tbh.
I think many of us have empathy, whatever our feelings.

Personally, I dislike this time of year more than any other. I don't generally get anxiety but I worry about the stupidest things. Have we got the kids too much or too little. Is that bird really reserved? What if they run out of sprouts? It's stupid first world problems when there's war and famine on elsewhere but it seems to be all I think of for a good week or more before hand. Then it's always ok on the day and I spend it cooking, drinking, eating and playing one of my Christmas playlists inspired by @chaileyjem 's excellent Spotify selections. I'm lucky, I've got wife, kids and dog here and a roof over my head. I can well imagine what it would be like without though and I think even the most positive of folk on here can too.

With that in mind, let's give everyone the space to use this thread and talk to each other. It's not a thread to be dominated by a couple of people. Everyone will have different feelings, different experiences. It doesn't mean that they are not sympathetic / empathetic to you or anyone else.
 

pearl

Well-known member
May 3, 2016
12,634
Behind My Eyes
I can usually get past the loneliness of Christmas knowing that effectively it's 1 day before I can treat Boxing Day as a normal day by going to football. However, this year the scheduling has screwed this plan up for me.
Do not begrudge anyone having fun at this time of year, but for me it just brings into focus how empty my life actually is.
On the plus side no one to buy presents for means not being a slave to commercialism.
Your life need not be empty because you are on your own.
I live alone, but I'm not lonely. I have interests and fill my life with stuff I like doing ... nothing spectacular, just reading, arty stuff, listening to music, going for a walk about. All the best.
 

LamieRobertson

Not awoke
Feb 3, 2008
46,253
SHOREHAM BY SEA
Unfortunately it can’t apply to everyone on here due to age and circumstances but I have to say 10 months of being a Grandparent is an excellent aid for my ongoing mental health issues, so the first Xmas with my Stanley is probably one of most exciting things I’ve ever contemplated in my life.

It gets better as Harty Junior is adding to the brood with Hart The Younger due on 11th May. 🐣

But I’m very aware of the issues many others on here will have and to reiterate if anyone on here needs to talk PM me, or ring my 24 hour work number 01903 206299 and I will ring you straight back. (If you’re fairly local we can meet up)

Take care one and all,


Harty ❤️
It gets even better being a grandparent (factor in we are naturally going to be older and all that entails) …..it’s a magical time for them and helping make it so has its own rewards.
 

Mr Bridger

Sound of the suburbs
Feb 25, 2013
4,360
Earth
Fook me there are some miserable barstards around. It's one of my favourite times of year.
I like the fact most places shut down and pubs are a lot busier.
More football matches.
Some of the residential homes are lit up wonderfully
Mulled wine and roasted chestnuts.
Possibility of snow.
People enjoying themselves.
Family get togethers

The only downer Is the cost.
I was going to say do you live in Croydon, but then saw the people enjoying themselves quote.
 


Weststander

Well-known member
NSC Licker Extraordinaire
Aug 25, 2011
62,630
Withdean area
Will always be my favourite time of year , however made significantly harder as lost my dad (66 years old) just before Xmas in 2021 so second year of trying to fill the void that he has left.

Thankfully my mum who was my major concern when he passed now has an active social life, is financially secure and will be retiring early next year, which takes the edge off.

Will always be a time of year that we will reflect on him missing from the memories and I doubt will ever get easier but learning to live with it.

We’ve made a conscious effort to install the importance of family and talking about it with the kids.

We try to give them the best Christmas we can every year and obviously prioritise them over ourselves.
We made a point of telling them some presents are from Santa and the majority from us which I hope goes some way to levelling out any perceived inequality of Santa’s love when talking presents with friends etc.

Enjoy and cherish it with those still around you and celebrate those that are longer with us

Heart warming post!
 

Eeyore

Lord Donkey of Queen's Park
NSC Licker Extraordinaire
Apr 5, 2014
23,144
I can get a little depressed between Christmas and New year because it reminds me I have no immediate family now. It is a strange feeling being the only one left. I often spend Christmas Day on my own out of choice. It's not as sad as it sounds because it is out of choice. I would get up early, go for a walk, visit my parent's grave and cook a special dinner. One of the best Christmas I had was when, having decided to do it alone, I discovered an elderly neighbour was without company. I invited her round and gave her dinner. She was overjoyed. It was as if the universe had a plan. Of course, a real upside is all the sport over the period. I spare no expense on subscriptions.

My ex has been insisting on making Christmas dinner for me and coming round. So that will happen for a while on the day. But I never have anyone here for long due to anxiety issues as we have covered on other threads.

On the upside, I work from home and tend to indulge myself in New Year planning. My immediate superior tries to get narky about it but struggles. We are good friends other than work mates. And she understands.

So it's an up and down period being a person who has mental health lows but is, paradoxically, very happy with his own company. I've been like that since I entered this world. But for 45 years I only ever missed one Christmas Day at my parents house. The longing doesn't leave me.
 


sydney

tinky ****in winky
Jul 11, 2003
17,665
town full of eejits
Unfortunately it can’t apply to everyone on here due to age and circumstances but I have to say 10 months of being a Grandparent is an excellent aid for my ongoing mental health issues, so the first Xmas with my Stanley is probably one of most exciting things I’ve ever contemplated in my life.

It gets better as Harty Junior is adding to the brood with Hart The Younger due on 11th May. 🐣

But I’m very aware of the issues many others on here will have and to reiterate if anyone on here needs to talk PM me, or ring my 24 hour work number 01903 206299 and I will ring you straight back. (If you’re fairly local we can meet up)

Take care one and all,


Harty ❤️
Nice one Ian , a merry festive season to you and yours and all the Worthing crew....Bazza..xx
 

cjd

Well-known member
Jun 22, 2006
6,038
La Rochelle
What a shame this thread has slipped down to page 5 ( !! ) on the main forum.

For many Xmas is a difficult period and I applaud a couple posters who have pointed out the many and varied good points of this time of year. It gives some balance...and also some hope and positiveness ( is there such a word ? ) to those struggling.

I hope future posters will still be OK to give out their often difficult situations ( which will remind many of us how fortunate we are )but hopefully a little less of the self-pitying.
 


PILTDOWN MAN

Well-known member
NSC Licker Extraordinaire
Sep 15, 2004
18,432
Hurst Green
Seeing all the kids and their partners, some staying over Christmas, 5 grandkids to deal with. They all want to come to me which is nice as this is the 2nd year since my wife died. In truth they know I'll do all the cooking and I have a full drinks fridge. I'm nearly there with the presents. Went to Bruges last week and going to France Monday so will be getting a few more bits.
 

cjd

Well-known member
Jun 22, 2006
6,038
La Rochelle
Seeing all the kids and their partners, some staying over Christmas, 5 grandkids to deal with. They all want to come to me which is nice as this is the 2nd year since my wife died. In truth they know I'll do all the cooking and I have a full drinks fridge. I'm nearly there with the presents. Went to Bruges last week and going to France Monday so will be getting a few more bits.
What inner strength you have. Well done !
 

BrightonCottager

Well-known member
Sep 30, 2013
2,056
Brighton
I'm bumping this thread because I just vocalised in a prominent local butchers that "I effing hate Christmas ". Apologies to any NSCers who happened to have been buying their organic pigs in blankets at the time and whose festive bonhomie was deflated as a result. This year's yuletide torment will take a new direction as me and my family are visiting my mum (who's Alzheimers is getting worse) so we can cook her dinner. We've then got my wife's family visiting us here in Brighton on Boxing day which will be a relief as it signals the end of the whole thing.
Surviving, not thriving.
 


Chicken Run

Member Since Jul 2003
NSC Licker Extraordinaire
Jul 17, 2003
18,113
Valley of Hangleton
I'm bumping this thread because I just vocalised in a prominent local butchers that "I effing hate Christmas ". Apologies to any NSCers who happened to have been buying their organic pigs in blankets at the time and whose festive bonhomie was deflated as a result. This year's yuletide torment will take a new direction as me and my family are visiting my mum (who's Alzheimers is getting worse) so we can cook her dinner. We've then got my wife's family visiting us here in Brighton on Boxing day which will be a relief as it signals the end of the whole thing.
Surviving, not thriving.
Barfields prices are enough to make anyone hate Christmas, good luck over the coming days
 
Last edited:

AmexRuislip

Trainee Spy 🕵️‍♂️
Feb 2, 2014
33,577
Ruislip
I'm bumping this thread because I just vocalised in a prominent local butchers that "I effing hate Christmas ". Apologies to any NSCers who happened to have been buying their organic pigs in blankets at the time and whose festive bonhomie was deflated as a result. This year's yuletide torment will take a new direction as me and my family are visiting my mum (who's Alzheimers is getting worse) so we can cook her dinner. We've then got my wife's family visiting us here in Brighton on Boxing day which will be a relief as it signals the end of the whole thing.
Surviving, not thriving.
That's going to be a fair bit of driving for you, I'll :wave: at you on the M25 :)
 

Cheshire Cat

The most curious thing..
I've never understood why everyone is supposed to like Christmas. It's become one enormous spendfest, where people buy and eat enormous amounts of crap. The build up lasts for months......

And then it's over.


What's that all about?
 

BrightonCottager

Well-known member
Sep 30, 2013
2,056
Brighton
Barfields prices are enough to make anyone hate Christmas, good luck over the coming days
As I don't eat or buy meat, they could have charged what they wanted and I wouldn't have a scoobies. In fact, I did admit that out loud so they probably did! They seem a decent bunch in there though and my daughter reckons one of them gives Mrs BC the glad eye. As long as not an extra portion of tongue, I don't mind.
 


Weststander

Well-known member
NSC Licker Extraordinaire
Aug 25, 2011
62,630
Withdean area
I've never understood why everyone is supposed to like Christmas. It's become one enormous spendfest, where people buy and eat enormous amounts of crap. The build up lasts for months......

And then it's over.


What's that all about?

Some love it (lights up a dark part of the year, a magic not lost from when a kid, seeing kids starry eyed, an enforced break from work for many together as a family, rich food).

Whilst others loath it.

That’s life, varied opinions.
 

Greg Bobkin

Silver Seagull
May 22, 2012
14,569
I've never understood why everyone is supposed to like Christmas. It's become one enormous spendfest, where people buy and eat enormous amounts of crap. The build up lasts for months......

And then it's over.


What's that all about?
So businesses can boost their profits at the end of the year, people can have a blow-out before the new year diets kick in and there's an excuse for people not to go to work due a bit.

I cannot be arsed with any of it - for numerous reasons. And Boxing day has gone from being a chilled out day to an open house with the same people we always see and would've spent the day with the day before!

FFS. Bring on the 27th.
 

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