An NSC tip for the single lads....

[Northstander]

Bearded men can obtain the appearance of an upper class Arctic explorer by simply applying Tippex to their beards, painting their noses blue, and cutting off a couple of toes. It never fails to impress the girls.

 

[Citrus]

 

[Barnet Seagull]

Every woman will tell you to be yourself if you don't want to be single anymore.

My advice?

Lie.

No one likes who you are, that's why you're single.

Be someone else, preferably someone who's less of a fuckwit.

Barnet