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Bell Cheeses at work



Eeyore

Lord Donkey of Queen's Park
NSC Patreon
Apr 5, 2014
23,376
I work with [MENTION=29192]Brighton Lines[/MENTION] - He is currently fuming and struggling with a new IT system. It's hilarious.

I'm fine with the **** arse **** **** **** system. **** off ****.
 






spongy

Well-known member
Aug 7, 2011
2,759
Burgess Hill
I work with [MENTION=29192]Brighton Lines[/MENTION] - He is currently fuming and struggling with a new IT system. It's hilarious.

I'm fine with the **** arse **** **** **** system. **** off ****.

I can actually picture it :lolol:

He's left the office (presumably in a huff). Oh well.

Gonna miss this when I leave!

This is probably my favourite segment of posts on this thread.

What ever happened to [MENTION=29192]Brighton Lines[/MENTION]?? Did he come back? Did he enjoy lunch break? Is he currently sitting in a pub cursing to anyone who will listen about this new ****ing system?

Did [MENTION=5010]Marty McFly[/MENTION] survive after outing Brighton Lines?

So many questions....
 


Marty McFly

Seagulls Over Canada
Aug 19, 2006
3,389
La Pêche, Quebec
This is probably my favourite segment of posts on this thread.

What ever happened to [MENTION=29192]Brighton Lines[/MENTION]?? Did he come back? Did he enjoy lunch break? Is he currently sitting in a pub cursing to anyone who will listen about this new ****ing system?

Did [MENTION=5010]Marty McFly[/MENTION] survive after outing Brighton Lines?

So many questions....

I'm sorry to dissapoint (both you and me), but he returned with a freshly made cuppa, and a whole host of profanities. I leave this job in twelve days. That's twelve days to break him.
 




Sirnormangall

Well-known member
Sep 21, 2017
2,937
Now that most people are back to work after the Xmas break, should we expect a surge of posts on this thread as you get re-acquainted with all those work colleagues you detest, or will the season of peace and good will persist at work ( albeit temporarily)?
 




Eeyore

Lord Donkey of Queen's Park
NSC Patreon
Apr 5, 2014
23,376
This is probably my favourite segment of posts on this thread.

What ever happened to [MENTION=29192]Brighton Lines[/MENTION]?? Did he come back? Did he enjoy lunch break? Is he currently sitting in a pub cursing to anyone who will listen about this new ****ing system?

Did [MENTION=5010]Marty McFly[/MENTION] survive after outing Brighton Lines?

So many questions....

My struggles with technology and change are well documented in these parts. [MENTION=5010]Marty McFly[/MENTION] is an irritating little scrote who would far easier to deal with if I didn't actually quite like him. We regularly exchange wholesome insults that shock everyone except ourselves. In fact I would be rather disturbed if he was pleasant to me.

Him and another dear chap in the office are buggering off to other pastures soon leaving me the only male in a 14 strong group. Thankfully I won't have to dumb down as everyone is aware that my bark is accompanied by paper teeth and me getting angry is more a source of amusement than concern.

The pub would have been a refreshing distraction yet I have had to wait till I arrived home in the village to crack open a bottle of wine and celebrate learning how to use a **** **** bollocks new IT system.
 
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FatSuperman

Well-known member
Feb 25, 2016
2,829
Now that most people are back to work after the Xmas break, should we expect a surge of posts on this thread as you get re-acquainted with all those work colleagues you detest, or will the season of peace and good will persist at work ( albeit temporarily)?

Are you still drunk? We'll have even less patience upon our return, when the cold reality of bell cheesery comes crashing back into our lives. I decided to shirk from home this week, for better NSC perusal and to drag out the break for as long as possible. Although of course that meant more time with my wife and kids, who - whilst I love them dearly - are capable of immense bell cheesery.
 


Mental Lental

Well-known member
Jul 5, 2003
2,271
Shiki-shi, Saitama
I'm looking forward to stories of dieting/exercise New Year's resolutions broken on the first day back.
 


Are you still drunk? We'll have even less patience upon our return, when the cold reality of bell cheesery comes crashing back into our lives. I decided to shirk from home this week, for better NSC perusal and to drag out the break for as long as possible. Although of course that meant more time with my wife and kids, who - whilst I love them dearly - are capable of immense bell cheesery.
".....Shirk from home...." love it, can I use it if we can agree royalties :) .
 






Guinness Boy

Tofu eating wokerati
Helpful Moderator
NSC Patreon
Jul 23, 2003
33,809
Up and Coming Sunny Portslade
Are you still drunk? We'll have even less patience upon our return, when the cold reality of bell cheesery comes crashing back into our lives. I decided to shirk from home this week, for better NSC perusal and to drag out the break for as long as possible. Although of course that meant more time with my wife and kids, who - whilst I love them dearly - are capable of immense bell cheesery.

I've had to shirk from home due to a couple of medical appointments and believe me I understand the bolded bit :lol:

Though next week promises two long bits of travel and a morning on "how to integrate CX in to an information technology project" :shootself:
 


FatSuperman

Well-known member
Feb 25, 2016
2,829
I've had to shirk from home due to a couple of medical appointments and believe me I understand the bolded bit :lol:

Though next week promises two long bits of travel and a morning on "how to integrate CX in to an information technology project" :shootself:

I assume that stands for customer experience? Another term for user experience, user journey, and countless other things that basically mean not being shit at design? I could bore you all to tears about some of the absolute travesties I've seen in the past 18 months alone. One very prestigious IT Consultancy we recently used followed the mock up screens that our team produced. They followed them exactly. So where the chap had drawn a few buttons that didn't align properly, they actually built the system so the buttons didn't align. Having discussions with them about this is like talking to my 13-year old son.

"Why are your clean clothes all over your floor"
"What do you mean floor?"
...

The system they built is utter crap, I'm lobbying to have the tagline changed to "It may be hard to use, but at least it's slow"
 






Guinness Boy

Tofu eating wokerati
Helpful Moderator
NSC Patreon
Jul 23, 2003
33,809
Up and Coming Sunny Portslade
I assume that stands for customer experience? Another term for user experience, user journey, and countless other things that basically mean not being shit at design? I could bore you all to tears about some of the absolute travesties I've seen in the past 18 months alone. One very prestigious IT Consultancy we recently used followed the mock up screens that our team produced. They followed them exactly. So where the chap had drawn a few buttons that didn't align properly, they actually built the system so the buttons didn't align. Having discussions with them about this is like talking to my 13-year old son.

"Why are your clean clothes all over your floor"
"What do you mean floor?"
...

The system they built is utter crap, I'm lobbying to have the tagline changed to "It may be hard to use, but at least it's slow"

Yep - Customer Experience. Marketing leading an IT project. What could go wrong?
 




Iggle Piggle

Well-known member
Sep 3, 2010
5,281
Oh god, as a PM it makes me very nervous when marketing ask for 'help with a project' .......

Help is loosely translated as someone to blame when it inevitably turns into a big steaming turd sat proudly in the middle of the office.

''I'm sorry, I can't spare any time at present'' is naturally the correct response.
 









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