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[Albion] Hat 3 security patdown 0



Stat Brother

Well-known member
NSC Licker Extraordinaire
Jul 11, 2003
73,270
West west west Sussex
For the last 3 games the contents of my pockets have been emptied into my hat, pre patdown.

The Chelsea patdown was particularly thorough, shoulders down to ankles, only missing my special place.

To date my hat has been immune to the security.

Begging the obvious question...
 

Djmiles

Barndoor Holroyd
Dec 1, 2005
12,060
Kitchener, Canada
The question being why would you want to put your possessions in your hat in the first place?
 


Weststander

Well-known member
NSC Licker Extraordinaire
Aug 25, 2011
63,156
Withdean area
For the last 3 games the contents of my pockets have been emptied into my hat, pre patdown.

The Chelsea patdown was particularly thorough, shoulders down to ankles, only missing my special place.

To date my hat has been immune to the security.

Begging the obvious question...

Like your style

C6B0EC56-3D72-4F31-BFEA-F64934BEA84A.png
 

Stat Brother

Well-known member
NSC Licker Extraordinaire
Jul 11, 2003
73,270
West west west Sussex
The question being why would you want to put your possessions in your hat in the first place?

So I can go straight through the patdown with minimal faff.
 


AmexRuislip

Trainee Spy 🕵️‍♂️
Feb 2, 2014
33,711
Ruislip
For the last 3 games the contents of my pockets have been emptied into my hat, pre patdown.

The Chelsea patdown was particularly thorough, shoulders down to ankles, only missing my special place.

To date my hat has been immune to the security.

Begging the obvious question...

They'll be calling it stop and starch next......:shrug:
 


Djmiles

Barndoor Holroyd
Dec 1, 2005
12,060
Kitchener, Canada
So I can go straight through the patdown with minimal faff.

Depends what you’re taking through I guess.

Usually with me it goes:

‘What’s that?’

‘Wallet, keys, phone’

‘OK thanks’

Seems like a faff to get it all out to put it straight back!!!
 


dazzer6666

Well-known member
NSC Licker Extraordinaire
Mar 27, 2013
51,892
Burgess Hill
Usual for me....

‘What’s that in your coat pocket ?’

‘Glasses case and a torch’

‘OK’

I’ve got a leftover flare in my cupboard from a paintballing session. It’s exactly the same size as the torch.
 

tiberious

New member
Nov 3, 2009
840
The earth
I leave everything in my pockets.. thy feel it dont ask what it is and let me go in. As searching goes it is sh*t. I was always taught that when you search someone your mindset is they have secreted something. You could easily carry an knife of Flask into the ground... yes I know you would get banned for the flask But not a knife in a flask as where would you put your half time Bovril ?
 

spongy

Well-known member
Aug 7, 2011
2,758
Burgess Hill
I walked up to my usual entrance in the South today...

Steward: Hi there, you ok?
Me: good thanks, you?
Steward: where are you sitting?
Me: normal seat
Steward: are you in in S1A?
Me:??
Steward: if you want S1A you need the next entrance along
Me: I don't think I sit in S1A, I always come in here.
Steward: I think you need the next entrance.
Me: I can see the back of my seat from here just there * points at concrete where my seat is*
Steward: I think you have the wrong entrance
Me: no I don't
Steward: away fans are further round the corner.
Me: I'm not an away fan. *
Steward: can I see your ticket please?
Me: this is my entrance, you've felt me up at least twice a month for 4 years
Steward: I need to see your ticket
Me: hang on (gets wallet out)
Steward: oh ok, this is your entrance
Me: I know, i did say.....
Steward: do you mind if I search you
Me: do I have a choice
Steward: no
Me: ok. (Holds arms out)
Steward: (gropes my coat pocket)
Me: is that it?
Steward: what
Me: nothing
Steward: what do you have on you?
Me: nothing I'm supposed to have
Steward: enjoy the game
Me: hopefully
 

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