Speak to your vet. They actually love animals. Don’t just presume your dog is in discomfort.... ask.I don't have advice, we're in a similar position.
Our cocker spaniel is 15.5 years old and struggling. She's deaf and her eyesight is terrible now. She's not off her food or drink, and doesn't appear to be in any discomfort, but she also doesn't seem to have any joy in life any more, and I think she has dementia (she doesn't really know who we are). She's been an amazing loving pet, she's never so much as shown her teeth at anyone, despite years of having her fur pulled by toddlers etc. Now she's not easy to look after (regular ear and eye cleaning, and she goes to the toilet inside more than out), but I don't want to put her down just because it would be easier for us.
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[Misc] Having a pet put down and the guilt that follows
- Thread starter theboybilly
- Start date
Super Steve Earle
Well-known member
Funny old place, NSC. There must be so many other outlets for grief and guilt, yet here we are supporting a fellow Albion fan, therefore one of the family. My absolute sympathies for your loss. You did the right thing and think of it as your final gift, act of kindness to a much loved family member. We lost a wonderful cat 5 years ago and the grief was truly awful, but our only guilt was that we held on to him a week or two longer than we should have done. But we love our pets so much. I would caution you not to dive straight in with another pet. Individually, they are irreplaceable and you will find you own moment to bring another pet in to your family. We have not found that moment yet, but I feel sure it will come. All the best.
portslade seagull
Well-known member
Oh my God she's lovely. Our 1st dog was an Alsatian/ Black Labrador cross. Not a bad bone but was protective of the boys when they were young. Never turned on anyone was well behaved
Cheshire Cat
The most curious thing..
You will feel completely shit, and that you have betrayed them somehow. I still feel this several months after having a cat put down, despite the vet's advice that she wouldn't be able to last much longer. I made the decision, I watched the light go out of her eyes, and I watched her die. It was and is crap. All you can console yourself with is that you did the best you could for then. No-one lasts for ever.
How do you know the delay was bad for her?
It might be best for us to have her put down, we don't know, but we're certainly not keeping her alive for ourselves - looking after her is not exactly a joyous experience any more.
I think you mean 'isn't in discomfort'?
When she gets stuck somewhere, like in the garden, she'll howl to let us know something's not right. She might also make a bit of noise if we're late with dinner, but otherwise she doesn't say much. I'm sure she would if she was in pain. But I'll see what the vet says.
theboybilly
Well-known member
- Thread starter
- #66
It's so difficult to know when it's 'that time'. But it must be better to let them go a little early when all the signs are there than guess everything is fine (not that I'm saying [MENTION=4019]Triggaaar[/MENTION] is)
I have taken great comfort from all of these replies that we have done what's best in the long run for our boy. I can't thank you all enough for taking the time. They've been most heartwarming
theboybilly
Well-known member
- Thread starter
- #67
They do indeed. Gail (who looked after Obi nearly all the time and always called him 'Obes' was crying her eyes out when we went down to say goodbye. 'I'm so sorry, this is most unprofessional' she said. We all just stood there in a sort of group hug. Wonderful people. Even the receptionist had the tissues out
theboybilly
Well-known member
- Thread starter
- #68
Thank you very much, kind words indeed. Today I've been blessed with all these responses but I shouldn't have been surprised really. NSC is truly a great forum - in my view the best.
- Aug 7, 2003
- 7,795
This thread has really hit a nerve, but not to do with having a pet put down, but parting with one. When I was about eight we had two dogs, Cindy a lovely mongrel and Pepe a young black poodle. The long and short of it, is they didn’t get on and one had to go. I was asked which one I would rather keep and I said Pepe, for no other reason than he was young and would be around longer. I remember sitting on the bus with my my mum and Cindy as we took her to the kennels near the pylons. I will never forget the look on Cindy's little face when we left her at the kennels and walked away. If only I could go back in time and try and make those two get on. The hurt will never go away.
It broke my heart when I had to have my Harry put down at 15 years 4 months having had him since 3 months. We both knew that day the game was up. He was my boy. Our bond was something extraordinary.
I still miss him every day and to be there when it was done was the hardest thing I have ever had to do in my life but I made a promise to be there and I was. It is the kindest and hardest thing you can ever do. You did the right thing and he loves you forever for it. Remember all the good times you had together. Stay strong
I still miss him every day and to be there when it was done was the hardest thing I have ever had to do in my life but I made a promise to be there and I was. It is the kindest and hardest thing you can ever do. You did the right thing and he loves you forever for it. Remember all the good times you had together. Stay strong
Raleigh Chopper
New member
Any ideas on how to put down an unwanted goldfish, it's very old and has a bit of fin rot and it costs me a fortune to change its water what with the cost of tapwater these days.
But I don't want to be cruel.
So far I have tried removing all the plastic weeds and the no fishing sign to try and bore it to death, having failed I persisted on the theme by holding my mobile to the glass and scrolling through all the pages of the Brexit thread, this nearly worked and I saw it giving up the will to live but it saw the posts by Two Professors and Baker Lite and it cheered up again ( have you ever seen a goldfish laugh and roll it's eyes)
I am now out of ideas and it's due another expensive water change soon which I am not too keen to do.
Thanks.
But I don't want to be cruel.
So far I have tried removing all the plastic weeds and the no fishing sign to try and bore it to death, having failed I persisted on the theme by holding my mobile to the glass and scrolling through all the pages of the Brexit thread, this nearly worked and I saw it giving up the will to live but it saw the posts by Two Professors and Baker Lite and it cheered up again ( have you ever seen a goldfish laugh and roll it's eyes)
I am now out of ideas and it's due another expensive water change soon which I am not too keen to do.
Thanks.
atfc village
Well-known member
just put my 15 and a half Year old lab out ,he is on he's last legs . Stopped going for a walk a year a go ,he just potters about the garden now . Sight is failing ,but he still functions ok . I hope i find him one morning gone rather than go through having to put him to sleep like the last lab i had . Which ever way it happens it will break my heart ,but as he is the first dog i bought on my own it's the best money i've ever spent. Tresco has a had a lovely life holidays with the family and never left out of anything .
My mum asked first, after our first cat got half run over, we all agreed, I was 14, My step father shielded our dog being put down from me in '96. I Had a headline gig at the Pavillion theatre that night, he did the right thing. Vets are better qualified than doctors not by accident. Morals are morals. The right thing was done. Remember the good stuff, I still do.
Don't scrimp, just flush.
Roller coaster super surf of a lifetime, way to go. If it survives that, there's probably another goldfish at the other end looking for sex.
It's win/win.
Flush to win!
Roller coaster super surf of a lifetime, way to go. If it survives that, there's probably another goldfish at the other end looking for sex.
It's win/win.
Flush to win!
Withdean and I
Well-known member
- Aug 6, 2003
- 1,347
So sorry to hear of your loss. Our four legged friends are part of our families and parting is so so hard.
Had to watch our 6 year old dog lose its ability to walk due to nerve damage and despite it being relatively young we followed the vets advice.
When the vet tells you that it’s what they would do then you know it’s the right thing.
Doesn’t make it any easier though, and being right there for it and stroking her as she was put to sleep was utterly heartbreaking as she was mentally very good.
Tough times but knowing you did the right thing for them helps the upset ease in the long run.
Had to watch our 6 year old dog lose its ability to walk due to nerve damage and despite it being relatively young we followed the vets advice.
When the vet tells you that it’s what they would do then you know it’s the right thing.
Doesn’t make it any easier though, and being right there for it and stroking her as she was put to sleep was utterly heartbreaking as she was mentally very good.
Tough times but knowing you did the right thing for them helps the upset ease in the long run.
Arkwright
Arkwright
Our Ginger tom called Merry Mayo Ginger Prince or just Ginger to his friends went to the vet in December as he was struggling to chew his food. Originally we were told it was just a couple of teeth to come out but during the operation the vet found a cancerous lump under his tongue. The vet rang my wife and we agreed that the lump should be removed so poor Ginger ended the day missing four teeth and having part of his tongue removed.
Upon his return home Ginger struggled to eat and clean himself and quickly became and shadow of his former self. To watch him deteriorate so quickly was heartbreaking but credit to him he was still so affectionate until we came to the decision that he had to be put down, such a hard thing to do but in the end you know your doing the right thing.
It's only been three weeks but my wife and I still beat ourselves up about giving the vet permission to do such a big operation and just removing a few teeth would have been enough and he would still have had a couple of years. Yes the cancer would have finally got him but at least he would have had a better ending and we could have made a final decision with Ginger having a better quality of life in his latter years.
I find it so hard not to blame the vet as I'm not convinced they fully understood the long term effects of the operation.
RIP Ginger, he was a Top Cat.
Upon his return home Ginger struggled to eat and clean himself and quickly became and shadow of his former self. To watch him deteriorate so quickly was heartbreaking but credit to him he was still so affectionate until we came to the decision that he had to be put down, such a hard thing to do but in the end you know your doing the right thing.
It's only been three weeks but my wife and I still beat ourselves up about giving the vet permission to do such a big operation and just removing a few teeth would have been enough and he would still have had a couple of years. Yes the cancer would have finally got him but at least he would have had a better ending and we could have made a final decision with Ginger having a better quality of life in his latter years.
I find it so hard not to blame the vet as I'm not convinced they fully understood the long term effects of the operation.
RIP Ginger, he was a Top Cat.
sydney
tinky ****in winky
no mate you're not ........although excrutiatingly hard you have probably done the right thing , staffies are great little characters and no doubt you and your missus have a great bond with him , sounds like the outcome was inevitable .....you'll fell better in a few days .
You'll be the luckiest dog owner if he does, but sadly that doesn't happen much.
Clarke's Consolation
New member
Having been regularly looking at NSC for many many years this thread has prompted me to register and post at 53yo and my first ever reply on any forum. Have really enjoyed and equally been frustrated by the forum through the bad times and the good.
This thread has had me in tears as similar to theboybilly we also said goodbye to our boy Tikka on Monday at around 10.30am. I last walked him before setting off for the game on Saturday, so a great day followed by some really bad ones. He had been going downhill for some months and on Sunday all the signs were there - struggling to get up, no appetite (even a bit of Chicken, his favourite, right in front of his mouth was not taken), standing prone and looking vacant, incontinent, etc.
He would have been 16 next month, so a good age, and the vet went through the options of tests and antibiotics but when she said the she would expect us to be back later this week we all knew what needed to happen, though myself and my wife already really knew. Hard parts were letting our daughters know who were 5 and 3 when we got him as a pup so do not remember life prior to Tikka. Also feel lost in the evenings as the routine of walkies and later letting him out in the garden before bed is now not there.
I may not post again however reading this thread has been comforting in many ways and has helped me through these early days without a big part of our family.
This thread has had me in tears as similar to theboybilly we also said goodbye to our boy Tikka on Monday at around 10.30am. I last walked him before setting off for the game on Saturday, so a great day followed by some really bad ones. He had been going downhill for some months and on Sunday all the signs were there - struggling to get up, no appetite (even a bit of Chicken, his favourite, right in front of his mouth was not taken), standing prone and looking vacant, incontinent, etc.
He would have been 16 next month, so a good age, and the vet went through the options of tests and antibiotics but when she said the she would expect us to be back later this week we all knew what needed to happen, though myself and my wife already really knew. Hard parts were letting our daughters know who were 5 and 3 when we got him as a pup so do not remember life prior to Tikka. Also feel lost in the evenings as the routine of walkies and later letting him out in the garden before bed is now not there.
I may not post again however reading this thread has been comforting in many ways and has helped me through these early days without a big part of our family.