[Misc] Career change at 36

zefarelly · Oct 29, 2018

I served an unofficial apprenticeship and worked as a draughtsman, design engineer, project engineer and ultimately project manager, then in my mid 30's with a young family I became a stay at home Dad and started my own business. The business has never been financially successful and ten years later its ruined a hobby. It did however fit in nicely with being a stay at home Dad and one of us always being there for our son . . . . . I'm now 47 and business is nigh on dead . . .and I don't know what to do. . I have no formal qualifications aside an ONC and a fisfull of O levels so most companies I look at won't touch me as I have no degree . . . . I look at my CV and I think the last 10 years looks bad on it. If I was 36 now with a young family I'm not sure what I'd do . . . .

In reply to the original post . . .how about trying to be an EA on reduced or compressed hours . . .maybe 3 days a week to keep you ticking over . . . . and spemnd the rest of the time on a new venture. OR, if you go feet first, at least wait until next March . . . . there is a lot of uncertainty out there at the moment and my business has suffered heavily as a consequence. ( its a luxury/hobby market )

Weststander · Oct 29, 2018

Hi,
I have experience of both building including bricklaying, and a career as a professional.

I can completely understand your views on selling, and agency. Agents have told me of the relentless pressure, the daily meetings at 8am in the ‘shops’ where the same crap gets discussed every day ... push, push, push to get sales to complete.

With building, bricklaying is rewarding and pays well. But over the years it takes its toll on the back and joints. It’s a hard trade. For the sake of time at college, even if you are able to part time, look at plumbing/heating, electrician or even carpentry. They’ll take less toll on you, you won’t always be out in all weathers, and income can be far better than that for brickies. Short term pain at college, and you’ll reap the benefits.

Good luck. You won’t regret getting off of the agency rat race.

maltaseagull · Oct 29, 2018

Farehamseagull said:
Been an estate agent for about 16 years and I've had enough. To be honest with you I've never enjoyed it, but it's not exactly the hardest job in the word so I've done ok at it and earned decent money. Have wanted to quit for years but because of mortgage/kids etc I've never wanted to take the risk of starting again and earning less money so instead I've changed job every couple of years in the hope of finding some happiness which I never have. The truth is I really don't like sales, it doesn't suit my personality at all but I've found it hard to get out.

I've struggled with it for years but it's really started to get me down recently. I've been suffering from stress quite a bit this year and I hate going to work each day - it is therefore also effecting my home life and I'm lucky enough to have a beautiful family so don't want to bring them down. With support from my other half we've agreed I do need to do something about it now as the way things are, people my age are going to be working for another 35 years or so which is a long time to be unhappy.

I fell in to estate agency as college/university just wasn't for me so unfortunately I don't have any qualifications or skills as such but i have always enjoyed being outside, practical and DIY etc. My brother in law is a brickie so I have helped him out a couple of times and I'm going to go on a part time course and work a bit with him at weekends whilst still working full time to hopefully train up to start working in the building industry. It will also mean that some of the experience I've built up in property will still go to a little use.

So I thought i'd put it out to the fount of knowledge that is NSC and see if anyone here has had a similar experience and changed career in late 30's/40's and how it worked out? Also any brickies/builders out there want to share their opinions on the job?!

Best of luck to you.
I had been a supermarket manager for 25 years and one day got the Argus jobs supplement out as I had had enough. There were 3 jobs I was qualified for in that issue: Postie, Milkman (It was a while ago) and Driving Instructor. I chose the last option and trained while still working. Once qualified, I resigned and loved the freedom of being self employed.Any fears of not earning enough were dispelled within weeks as my diary was full very quickly.

The only concern i would have in your chosen job is that it's outside, very cold and wet in winter and, whilst not true yet but in 15 -20 years, will maybe too physically demanding.

zefarelly · Oct 29, 2018

Having done building work over the years on and off ( believe it or not I like it, occasionally) I would NOT take it up at 36 . . .hard physical work is great and pays well when you're a fit youngster, but I know brilliant brickies who can barely lift their arms above thir heads at 50, and a hod carrier, who was superhuman at 20 . . .nigh on crippled at 35.

You will not get physically better after 35!

Weststander · Oct 29, 2018

zefarelly said:
Having done building work over the years on and off ( believe it or not I like it, occasionally) I would NOT take it up at 36 . . .hard physical work is great and pays well when you're a fit youngster, but I know brilliant brickies who can barely lift their arms above thir heads at 50, and a hod carrier, who was superhuman at 20 . . .nigh on crippled at 35.

You will not get physically better after 35!

Negative, but true. There are much better building trades. A friend also told me recently that his brickie mate has just passed away from skin C.

Timbo · Oct 29, 2018

zefarelly said:
Having done building work over the years on and off ( believe it or not I like it, occasionally) I would NOT take it up at 36 . . .hard physical work is great and pays well when you're a fit youngster, but I know brilliant brickies who can barely lift their arms above thir heads at 50, and a hod carrier, who was superhuman at 20 . . .nigh on crippled at 35.

You will not get physically better after 35!

Definitely this. Choose something else, plumber, chippie.

I had a change when I got to 40 as I’d just got too old to be doing what was essentially a young mans job. The mornings had got too cold, days too long, too far away from home and I’d stopped enjoying it and I can’t imagine going to work and not enjoying it. Took the first job that came along and have absolutely loved it ever since, was managing one side of the firm within six years.

Honestly can’t imagine dreading going to work. If you don’t enjoy don’t do it. Life’s far too short without spending half of it doing something you hate.

Mayonaise · Oct 29, 2018

I had a career change at 37 and have never looked back. Go for it and good luck.

pauli cee · Oct 29, 2018

Please, please, please.
Just don't become an electrician....

DavidinSouthampton · Oct 29, 2018

Farehamseagull said:
Been an estate agent for about 16 years and I've had enough. To be honest with you I've never enjoyed it, but it's not exactly the hardest job in the word so I've done ok at it and earned decent money. Have wanted to quit for years but because of mortgage/kids etc I've never wanted to take the risk of starting again and earning less money so instead I've changed job every couple of years in the hope of finding some happiness which I never have. The truth is I really don't like sales, it doesn't suit my personality at all but I've found it hard to get out.

I've struggled with it for years but it's really started to get me down recently. I've been suffering from stress quite a bit this year and I hate going to work each day - it is therefore also effecting my home life and I'm lucky enough to have a beautiful family so don't want to bring them down. With support from my other half we've agreed I do need to do something about it now as the way things are, people my age are going to be working for another 35 years or so which is a long time to be unhappy.

I fell in to estate agency as college/university just wasn't for me so unfortunately I don't have any qualifications or skills as such but i have always enjoyed being outside, practical and DIY etc. My brother in law is a brickie so I have helped him out a couple of times and I'm going to go on a part time course and work a bit with him at weekends whilst still working full time to hopefully train up to start working in the building industry. It will also mean that some of the experience I've built up in property will still go to a little use.

So I thought i'd put it out to the fount of knowledge that is NSC and see if anyone here has had a similar experience and changed career in late 30's/40's and how it worked out? Also any brickies/builders out there want to share their opinions on the job?!

Don't have any experience in the building or associated trades, but all the best and go for it. I'm involved on a voluntary basis with an organisation that does employment etc advice, and part of the aim is to get people in to something they enjoy and will find it rewarding. I know full well, therefore, that it can be done. And you are one (Or more) step(s) ahead, in that you have some idea of what you want to do, and the support of those around you. All the very best.

El Presidente · Oct 29, 2018

You’ve got one life, don’t spend 5 days a week 47 weeks a year being miserable where you work.

I worked in the private sector until I was 40, well paid, but it was often 6 days a week and evenings, office politics, brown nosing to get anywhere, keeping the head down when clients were lost and redundancy fears were circulating, and I hated it.

Managed to get a job at uni, took a 30% pay cut, had to sell the car, cycle to work 11 miles each way initially, wife not happy, but I loved it and haven’t looked back. Wear jeans and T shirt instead of a suit and more through luck than judgement now talk about football...ish for a living after realising that students took far more interest in the subject when football was being mentioned. The rewards are seeing light bulbs going on in heads and hearing about their success stories following graduation, far more rewarding than anything monetary.

Go for it, work hard and believe in yourself.

Good luck.

darkwolf666 · Oct 29, 2018

Left school at 16 and did an apprenticeship in print, a trade I worked in for 30 years, before I took a career change at 47 years of age and joined the police.

I then took a further change of career, taking care, with my wife, of 3 children with varying degrees of disability - now that was a change, a change in everything, home life, family life, social life (suddenly no invites to dinner parties), it’s even affected our relationship as a couple...., but as far as I’m concerned it has all been worth it.

vegster · Oct 29, 2018

I would stick with what you are doing and milk it. I started doing an OK job that I grew to like and enjoy but the job slowly changed and now it pays crap and I hate it. It's too late for me to get out or change career but boy do I envy Estate Agents.

A pals daughter is trousering obscene amounts of money at the age of 32 as a slightly senior Estate Agent. Stick with it, unless you are an entrepreneur or solicitor or a Dentist it's not worth jumping ship.

Weststander · Oct 29, 2018

darkwolf666 said:
Left school at 16 and did an apprenticeship in print, a trade I worked in for 30 years, before I took a career change at 47 years of age and joined the police.

I then took a further change of career, taking care, with my wife, of 3 children with varying degrees of disability - now that was a change, a change in everything, home life, family life, social life (suddenly no invites to dinner parties), it’s even affected our relationship as a couple...., but as far as I’m concerned it has all been worth it.

I'm really glad that's worked out for you, plus time with your kids is priceless. [Without prying, I hope your family, with the needs you touch upon, receive the support you might need from the state. Although I'm not a party political leftie, a civilised society should direct adequate resources to those genuinely needing it IMO.]

Knocky's Nose · Oct 29, 2018

vegster said:
A pals daughter is trousering obscene amounts of money at the age of 32 as a slightly senior Estate Agent. Stick with it, unless you are an entrepreneur or solicitor or a Dentist it's not worth jumping ship.

I've earned £100k+ a year and been thoroughly miserable. I've been sat in a private cabin on a First Class flight to New York sipping Champagne, thoroughly miserable... whilst being surrounded by thoroughly miserable people. I've had dinner at the Burj Al Arab, surrounded by miserable people. I've been in private boxes at Old Trafford. the Amex and the O2 - surrounded by miserable dickheads. Money can get you the trappings like cars, watches and hotels. It can get you into nice places where you can eat nice food and drink nice wine - but if you're unhappy in the first place, you're just doing nice things whilst you're unhappy. It kinda cancels itself out..

I've always said (after an upbringing on a shit poor council estate in Bradford) "If you don't have to worry about paying the electric bill or gas bill, the weekly shop isn't a problem, the kids are warm, fed and clothed, and you don't have to worry about paying for a holiday - you're rich". I stand by that.

You spend the majority of your waking hours working. Be happy doing that. If you are, you've got a good life. The rest will follow, because if you really enjoy something you'll become good at it. Being good at something means you'll get paid well - and then it all turns the circle :thumbsup:

maffew · Oct 29, 2018

Farehamseagull said:
Been an estate agent for about 16 years and I've had enough. To be honest with you I've never enjoyed it, but it's not exactly the hardest job in the word so I've done ok at it and earned decent money. Have wanted to quit for years but because of mortgage/kids etc I've never wanted to take the risk of starting again and earning less money so instead I've changed job every couple of years in the hope of finding some happiness which I never have. The truth is I really don't like sales, it doesn't suit my personality at all but I've found it hard to get out.

I've struggled with it for years but it's really started to get me down recently. I've been suffering from stress quite a bit this year and I hate going to work each day - it is therefore also effecting my home life and I'm lucky enough to have a beautiful family so don't want to bring them down. With support from my other half we've agreed I do need to do something about it now as the way things are, people my age are going to be working for another 35 years or so which is a long time to be unhappy.

I fell in to estate agency as college/university just wasn't for me so unfortunately I don't have any qualifications or skills as such but i have always enjoyed being outside, practical and DIY etc. My brother in law is a brickie so I have helped him out a couple of times and I'm going to go on a part time course and work a bit with him at weekends whilst still working full time to hopefully train up to start working in the building industry. It will also mean that some of the experience I've built up in property will still go to a little use.

So I thought i'd put it out to the fount of knowledge that is NSC and see if anyone here has had a similar experience and changed career in late 30's/40's and how it worked out? Also any brickies/builders out there want to share their opinions on the job?!

Good luck to you that's all! Thats a lot of years left, and if its making you unhappy, get out. Think of like changing halves at half time! I am of a similar age (well a little older) and doing something quite dissimilar to what I have done in the past. I've had to take lower pay for a bit, but hey , that will come, and doing work you enjoy going into makes (or for me anyway) a huuuge difference. Healthy and happy mostly comes ahead of money now. If you have got the support of your family and it takes the pressure off a bit, happy days. Its tough without that!!!

I'm sure you wont look back

But you will at 65 I imagine and hadn't tried. Go for it

vegster · Oct 29, 2018

Knocky's Nose said:
I've earned £100k+ a year and been thoroughly miserable. I've been sat in a private cabin on a First Class flight to New York sipping Champagne, thoroughly miserable... whilst being surrounded by thoroughly miserable people. I've had dinner at the Burj Al Arab, surrounded by miserable people. I've been in private boxes at Old Trafford. the Amex and the O2 - surrounded by miserable dickheads. Money can get you the trappings like cars, watches and hotels. It can get you into nice places where you can eat nice food and drink nice wine - but if you're unhappy in the first place, you're just doing nice things whilst you're unhappy. It kinda cancels itself out..

I've always said (after an upbringing on a shit poor council estate in Bradford) "If you don't have to worry about paying the electric bill or gas bill, the weekly shop isn't a problem, the kids are warm, fed and clothed, and you don't have to worry about paying for a holiday - you're rich". I stand by that.

You spend the majority of your waking hours working. Be happy doing that. If you are, you've got a good life. The rest will follow, because if you really enjoy something you'll become good at it. Being good at something means you'll get paid well - and then it all turns the circle [emoji106]

You are taking the piss right? Try being miserable on £15k a year and come back to me then.

dingodan · Oct 29, 2018

Weststander · Oct 29, 2018

Knocky's Nose said:
I've earned £100k+ a year and been thoroughly miserable. I've been sat in a private cabin on a First Class flight to New York sipping Champagne, thoroughly miserable... whilst being surrounded by thoroughly miserable people. I've had dinner at the Burj Al Arab, surrounded by miserable people. I've been in private boxes at Old Trafford. the Amex and the O2 - surrounded by miserable dickheads. Money can get you the trappings like cars, watches and hotels. It can get you into nice places where you can eat nice food and drink nice wine - but if you're unhappy in the first place, you're just doing nice things whilst you're unhappy. It kinda cancels itself out..

I've always said (after an upbringing on a shit poor council estate in Bradford) "If you don't have to worry about paying the electric bill or gas bill, the weekly shop isn't a problem, the kids are warm, fed and clothed, and you don't have to worry about paying for a holiday - you're rich". I stand by that.

You spend the majority of your waking hours working. Be happy doing that. If you are, you've got a good life. The rest will follow, because if you really enjoy something you'll become good at it. Being good at something means you'll get paid well - and then it all turns the circle

Briliant post.

I had colleagues so unhappy with their job/boss, for years, decades even, who wouldn't leave because of the OK money and because their negative parents had told them "Better the devil you know" or "Careful jumping from the frying pan into the fire". They described Sunday's as having that sick 'back to school feeling', so it even affected a chunk of their leisure time.

Life really is too short and precious. Do not stay in a job/career where you're unhappy and nothing material is going to change.

Weststander · Oct 29, 2018

vegster said:
You are taking the piss right? Try being miserable on £15k a year and come back to me then.

Nonsense. There are highly paid people, trapped with huge financial commitments, or under immense work pressures, who take their lives or otherwise harm themself.

essbee1 · Oct 29, 2018

Life is too short to do something you hate. Follow your heart mate and you won't go to far wrong.

You'll find the way.

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