[Misc] Children Saying Thank You Christmas/Birthday Gifts!

Chicken Run · Feb 2, 2022

I used the word children but mine are 18,21 & 26.

Anyway they get quite generous gifts from Nan and Step Grandparents for birthdays and Christmas, they even get Easter Eggs/money, and all of them need constant badgering to pass on a simple thank you!

It really makes me angry that I have to chase them up, is this normal, do other NSC parents have similar issues or are you not overly bothered if they don’t reach out??

My two eldest have their own places and 18 yo daughter lives with me week on week off, I’ve actually asked the grandparents not to bother with gifts going forward [emoji35]

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Commander · Feb 2, 2022

I was always made to write thank you letters after Christmas as a kid. I remember it feeling like an absolutely MASSIVE effort, and hated having to give up so much of my time (probably 20 mins) so much that it almost wasn't worth Christmas existing for.

Kids are twats sometimes.

Chicken Run · Feb 2, 2022

Commander said:
I was always made to write thank you letters after Christmas as a kid. I remember it feeling like an absolutely MASSIVE effort, and hated having to give up so much of my time (probably 20 mins) so much that it almost wasn't worth Christmas existing for.

Kids are twats sometimes.

Good point, as a kid we were told to ring aunties, grandparents ect with mum standing over us!!!

I mean these kids have got incredible tech practically organically attached to their hands and they still can’t communicate!

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Thunder Bolt · Feb 2, 2022

My kids used to ring or write. My grandchildren text me their thanks nowadays.

Icy Gull · Feb 2, 2022

So many kids are more entitled than some football fans :wink:

I am old enough to remember getting ONE decent present from my parents and small presents or a few bob from relatives. Writing thank you letters was de rigueur. Kids get so many fecking presents these days and I know my grandkids have to be seriously pestered to write a thank you note.

Depends on the parents and how strict they are about it. No kid is going to do it by choice are they?

Psychobilly freakout · Feb 2, 2022

I am of the belief that you don't give gifts to receive gratitude

Hamilton · Feb 2, 2022

Mrs H and I still write and so do our offspring and they are 22, 24, 25, 28, 31 and 34.

Icy Gull · Feb 2, 2022

Psychobilly freakout said:
I am of the belief that you don't give gifts to receive gratitude

The perfect relative, I’m with you, it doesn’t bother me in the least if I get no more than a thank you at the time or a phone call to say thanks. I DO expect a thank you of some sort, it’s just good manners and they are in short supply too often.

Chicken Run · Feb 2, 2022

Psychobilly freakout said:
I am of the belief that you don't give gifts to receive gratitude

I’m of the belief that when you receive gifts you do though, that’s not unreasonable is it?

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Chicken Run · Feb 2, 2022

Hamilton said:
Mrs H and I still write and so do our offspring and they are 22, 24, 25, 28, 31 and 34.

That is very pleasing to hear, proper old school and SIX CHILDREN [emoji54]

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Tim Over Whelmed · Feb 2, 2022

I have a policy with the Grand kids, if the say "Thank You", to me it's something they appreciate and value and I should do again. That said, I'm sure their parents spend an inordinate amount of time extracting said "Thank You".

Chicken Run · Feb 2, 2022

Tim Over Whelmed said:
I have a policy with the Grand kids, if the say "Thank You", to me it's something they appreciate and value and I should do again. That said, I'm sure their parents spend an inordinate amount of time extracting said "Thank You".

So if they don’t say thank you you assume they don’t appreciate your gift of value it, I assume then you don’t bother going forward?

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juliant · Feb 2, 2022

Same issue with my 19 yo lad. My response is in these days if you cant even send a thank you text/email then dont expect a gift next year

Psychobilly freakout · Feb 2, 2022

Chicken Run said:
I’m of the belief that when you receive gifts you do though, that’s not unreasonable is it?

No, not at all, it is good manners in my book.
However I am also not bothered in the slightest if someone does or does not say thank you.
I certainly would not start a thread on social media moaning about not getting a thank you, but each to their own.

Hamilton · Feb 2, 2022

Chicken Run said:
That is very pleasing to hear, proper old school and SIX CHILDREN [emoji54]

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Some are mine. Some are hers. We love them all. They're brilliant people and I'm very lucky.

It was a very busy house.

Cadiz Seagull · Feb 2, 2022

Commander said:
I was always made to write thank you letters after Christmas as a kid. I remember it feeling like an absolutely MASSIVE effort, and hated having to give up so much of my time (probably 20 mins) so much that it almost wasn't worth Christmas existing for.

Kids are twats sometimes.

My parents always made me write thank you letters after Christmas so I was always going to get my own back on you and your siblings!

I hated writing them too, esecially when someone gave me a fountain pen as a present which meant I had no excuse.

If only we'd had copy and paste back in those days!

Simster · Feb 2, 2022

My kids always have always written to say thank you until they got to age 15ish. After that, it was emails and texts. I think once you're an adult, you shouldn't be expected to write. It's a nice thing to do of course, but you do become time-poor as you get older so I think as long as you say thank you in some form, that is acceptable.

Tiptoe through the NSC · Feb 2, 2022

In our household/family, presents handed over do not need a formal thank you, although I would be frankly astonished if any of my four kids did not express their gratitude in some way. For gifts received through the post, there is an expectation that a thank you by letter or text will be forthcoming. After all, there is no other way of confirming safe arrival. Our "kids" are 34, 27, 25 and 19 and the oldest two have implemented exactly the same rules for their own offspring, which leads me to believe it is a fair system. I don't see it as an issue of expectations, more a simple case of manners.

el punal · Feb 2, 2022

Hamilton said:
Mrs H and I still write and so do our offspring and they are 22, 24, 25, 28, 31 and 34.

That’s your lottery numbers sorted then.

South Stand Bonfire · Feb 2, 2022

I work on the basis that saying thank you costs nothing and I have drummed it into my child to write and say thank you. She actually wrote her thank you letters Xmas night, one of which I delivered to a friend at the Brentford game on Boxing day which I actually thought was undue haste but didn't obviously say that to her.

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[Misc] Children Saying Thank You Christmas/Birthday Gifts!

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