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[Help] Is the personal pronoun for a trans non-binary person singular or plural?



Goldstone1976

Goldstone1976

We Got Calde in!!
Helpful Moderator
NSC Patron
Apr 30, 2013
13,784
Herts
Someone came out to me a few days ago as "transgender, non-binary". After a bit of exploration by myself around what that actually meant, I was told that I needed to use "they" as a personal pronoun for them in future.

Aside from the fact that I'm really going to struggle to remember to do this - because I've known the individual as a man for nigh on a decade, so am likely to forget - there is a more pressing concern: should I be declining the reference in the singular or plural?

Is it "They is coming for a beer"? or "They are coming for a beer"?
 






Goldstone1976

Goldstone1976

We Got Calde in!!
Helpful Moderator
NSC Patron
Apr 30, 2013
13,784
Herts
MattBackHome said:
They are

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Click to expand...

Even though that will inevitably lead to confusion in the mind of the person to whom I'm addressing the statement?

"They are coming for a beer"
"Who are?"
"PPF* are"
"PPF and whom?"
"Just PPF"
"Errr..."

*Name chosen at random. Any similarities to actual persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.
 


Tom Hark Preston Park

Tom Hark Preston Park

Will Post For Cash
Jul 6, 2003
70,161
Goldstone1976 said:
Aside from the fact that I'm really going to struggle to remember to do this - because I've known the individual as a man for nigh on a decade, so am likely to forget - there is a more pressing concern: should I be declining the reference in the singular or plural?

Is it "They is coming for a beer"? or "They are coming for a beer"?
Click to expand...

Easiest solution would be to decline the beer invite shirley? Wait til They ask you. Job done :thumbsup:
 






G

Greg Bobkin

Silver Seagull
May 22, 2012
14,847
Goldstone1976 said:
Even though that will inevitably lead to confusion in the mind of the person to whom I'm addressing the statement?

"They are coming for a beer"
"Who are?"
"PPF* are"
"PPF and whom?"
"Just PPF"
"Errr..."

*Name chosen at random. Any similarities to actual persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.
Click to expand...


"They are coming for a beer"
"Who are?"
"PPF"

The same as you could have a conversation along the lines of:

"Someone's coming around today look at my house."
"Where are they coming from?"
"They are coming from Bristol."
"What time will they be here?"
"About 6pm"

You're still talking about an individual, all the time up until they are identified.
 


beorhthelm

beorhthelm

A. Virgo, Football Genius
Jul 21, 2003
35,303


Birdie Boy

Birdie Boy

Well-known member
Jun 17, 2011
4,108
Greg Bobkin said:
"They are coming for a beer"
"Who are?"
"PPF"

The same as you could have a conversation along the lines of:

"Someone's coming around today look at my house."
"Where are they coming from?"
"They are coming from Bristol."
"What time will they be here?"
"About 6pm"

You're still talking about an individual, all the time up until they are identified.
Click to expand...
You should be replying he or she is coming from Bristol, not they...

Sent from my WAS-LX1A using Tapatalk
 








G

Greg Bobkin

Silver Seagull
May 22, 2012
14,847
Birdie Boy said:
You should be replying he or she is coming from Bristol, not they...

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Click to expand...

Not if you didn't know if it was a man or woman coming...
 








B

Billy the Fish

Technocrat
Oct 18, 2005
17,496
Haywards Heath
Greg Bobkin said:
"They are coming for a beer"
"Who are?"
"PPF"

The same as you could have a conversation along the lines of:

"Someone's coming around today look at my house."
"Where are they coming from?"
"They are coming from Bristol."
"What time will they be here?"
"About 6pm"

You're still talking about an individual, all the time up until they are identified.
Click to expand...

It's the correct answer
 




Easy 10

Easy 10

Brain dead MUG SHEEP
Jul 5, 2003
61,753
Location Location
Bear in mind too, if they is single, then they may also object to this label and instead ask to be referred to as being "self-partnering".
 




RossyG

RossyG

Well-known member
Dec 20, 2014
2,630
Their pronouns are either he or she depending on whether they are male or female.
 






F

Fungus

Well-known member
NSC Patron
May 21, 2004
7,046
Truro
Wasn't there a long NSC discussion on this about a month ago?
 


zefarelly

zefarelly

Well-known member
NSC Patron
Jul 7, 2003
21,811
Sussex, by the sea
Thing, or IT?

Maybe we should just all refer to anyone a bit special as Dave, it'll be in the dictionary next year.
 


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