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[Albion] Why does every player want to play for the Albion?



Stat Brother

Well-known member
NSC Licker Extraordinaire
Jul 11, 2003
73,270
West west west Sussex
Reading these hallowed tomes recently I've come to the conclusion that every footballer in the whole wide world wants to play for the Albion.

All the club has to do is click their fingers and illustrious luminaries of the beauty game such as Shelvey, Brookes, Abrahams, Carroll, Mooy would come over all queer and sign in a heartbeat.

Yet the club still struggles to sign the likes of Milner, Balotelli and Morrison.

To me (to you) it seems that buying football players isn't quite as straightforward as those currently smashing their scrotchniblick onto a keyboard, would have us believe.
 


Fungus

Well-known member
NSC Licker Extraordinaire
May 21, 2004
7,033
Truro
Why would they need to be queer?
 


vegster

Sanity Clause
May 5, 2008
27,853
I think the OP's lycra shorts are getting too tight now and exerting pressure on the lower brain.
 
Last edited:

Guy Fawkes

The voice of treason
Sep 29, 2007
8,186
Reading these hallowed tomes recently I've come to the conclusion that every footballer in the whole wide world wants to play for the Albion.

All the club has to do is click their fingers and illustrious luminaries of the beauty game such as Shelvey, Brookes, Abrahams, Carroll, Mooy would come over all queer and sign in a heartbeat.

Yet the club still struggles to sign the likes of Milner, Balotelli and Morrison.

To me (to you) it seems that buying football players isn't quite as straightforward as those currently smashing their scrotchniblick onto a keyboard, would have us believe.

It's obvious isn't it, the only reason this hasn't happened yet is because we are too tight to pay the wages they would demand and that's the only reason we hadn't signed the likes of Messi, Ronaldo, Courtinho, De Bruyne, Salah, etc..... as they are all begging to play for us

After all they'd happily sign for us on Football manager (once the player has used the editor to make it happen)
 


Stat Brother

Well-known member
NSC Licker Extraordinaire
Jul 11, 2003
73,270
West west west Sussex
It's obvious isn't it, the only reason this hasn't happened yet is because we are too tight to pay the wages they would demand and that's the only reason we hadn't signed the likes of Messi, Ronaldo, Courtinho, De Bruyne, Salah, etc..... as they are all begging to play for us

After all they'd happily sign for us on Football manager (once the player has used the editor to make it happen)

Ah of course, silly me:-

It's really easy to get players to sign in Football Manager therefore the same must follow in real life.
 

amexer

Well-known member
Aug 8, 2011
6,142
Players signing from Championship clubs and below , sign as career move and money all others 100% money
 


crookie

Well-known member
Jun 14, 2013
3,303
Back in Sussex
Reading these hallowed tomes recently I've come to the conclusion that every footballer in the whole wide world wants to play for the Albion.

All the club has to do is click their fingers and illustrious luminaries of the beauty game such as Shelvey, Brookes, Abrahams, Carroll, Mooy would come over all queer and sign in a heartbeat.

Yet the club still struggles to sign the likes of Milner, Balotelli and Morrison.

To me (to you) it seems that buying football players isn't quite as straightforward as those currently smashing their scrotchniblick onto a keyboard, would have us believe.

Couldn't you just have posted this on the "Summer Signings" thread ?:shrug:
 

DJ NOBO

Well-known member
Jul 18, 2004
6,310
Wiltshire
Reading these hallowed tomes recently I've come to the conclusion that every footballer in the whole wide world wants to play for the Albion.

All the club has to do is click their fingers and illustrious luminaries of the beauty game such as Shelvey, Brookes, Abrahams, Carroll, Mooy would come over all queer and sign in a heartbeat.

Yet the club still struggles to sign the likes of Milner, Balotelli and Morrison.

To me (to you) it seems that buying football players isn't quite as straightforward as those currently smashing their scrotchniblick onto a keyboard, would have us believe.

This is what happens when statisticians confuse themselves with poets
 

Mr Bridger

Sound of the suburbs
Feb 25, 2013
4,390
Earth
Reading these hallowed tomes recently I've come to the conclusion that every footballer in the whole wide world wants to play for the Albion.

All the club has to do is click their fingers and illustrious luminaries of the beauty game such as Shelvey, Brookes, Abrahams, Carroll, Mooy would come over all queer and sign in a heartbeat.

Yet the club still struggles to sign the likes of Milner, Balotelli and Morrison.

To me (to you) it seems that buying football players isn't quite as straightforward as those currently smashing their scrotchniblick onto a keyboard, would have us believe.

You are the last chuckle brother
 


Stat Brother

Well-known member
NSC Licker Extraordinaire
Jul 11, 2003
73,270
West west west Sussex

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