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[Misc] Tales from ESU



swindonseagull

swindonseagull

Well-known member
Aug 6, 2003
9,262
Swindon, but used to be Manila
Dont know how to explain this humorous incident......

One chap had a a bad cough all first half.....oldish chap in the row in front complained that ' he and his wife was being coughed on' he said the guy with the cough did not cover his mouth!!! ( He did ) How he could see this if he was watching the game and not looking behind him I dont know....anyway at half time the complaining man was not happy being told to sit down and off he went to get a steward.( was it a racist, homophobic or hate cough?).....a steward appeared and basically told complaining man ' there's a lot of it about' its winter and people are coughing....

Complaining man then argued that people with coughs should not go outside the house.......!!!!

Steward as good as said ' get a life ' and turned to go.....Just as complaining man opened his bag and tried to pour a hot drink from a flask....!!!

Flask then confiscated by steward as we all know the rules.

You really could not make it up........
 






Green Gull

Green Gull

New member
Feb 25, 2018
258
Great story!

To be fair, it's pretty hard core in the ESU. I wouldn't want this thug in the North with his flask of Bovril & recently caught cough.

Sent from my Pixel 2 using Tapatalk
 


AmexRuislip

AmexRuislip

Trainee Spy 🕵️‍♂️
Feb 2, 2014
33,799
Ruislip
swindonseagull said:
Dont know how to explain this humorous incident......

One chap had a a bad cough all first half.....oldish chap in the row in front complained that ' he and his wife was being coughed on' he said the guy with the cough did not cover his mouth!!! ( He did ) How he could see this if he was watching the game and not looking behind him I dont know....anyway at half time the complaining man was not happy being told to sit down and off he went to get a steward.( was it a racist, homophobic or hate cough?).....a steward appeared and basically told complaining man ' there's a lot of it about' its winter and people are coughing....

Complaining man then argued that people with coughs should not go outside the house.......!!!!

Steward as good as said ' get a life ' and turned to go.....Just as complaining man opened his bag and tried to pour a hot drink from a flask....!!!

Flask then confiscated by steward as we all know the rules.

You really could not make it up........
Click to expand...

Anyone on here Andy?
A few coughing dodgers on here :lolol:
 






Stat Brother

Stat Brother

Well-known member
NSC Patron
Jul 11, 2003
73,638
West west west Sussex
As this this the 'Cool Story Bro' thread, here's mine.


Security pat down.

In my pockets I had, keys, wallet, change, sweets and phone.
I thought 'this is gonna be a bit of a ballache', so I emptied the contents of my pockets into my cap.

Holding my cap I was patted down, waved through after which I returned everything back to my pockets and cap to my head.


I'm taking a flask in with me next game:-

0e26021bc83a7ffd4b3f9360174a74fb.jpg
 


catfish

catfish

North Stand Brighton Boy
Dec 17, 2010
7,677
Worthing
Good job he didn't have a blanket....could have turned into a riot.
 














J

jasetheace

New member
Apr 13, 2011
712
A different perspective from me. Been down with that dreadful stomach bug all week that affected the Aussie Rugby Team (Don't ask). Felt marginally better yesterday but had to make a judgement call that respected those with and around me. On balance decided not to risk it.

People have lives to live and some are more vulnerable than others.I have a degree of sympathy for those that are frustrated by those that bring illness to public spaces. Stay in bed. Get better. Work from home if you can (and a lot can these days).
 




A

A mex eyecan

Well-known member
Nov 3, 2011
3,304
In the queue for Lewes train yesterday several Leicester supporters waiting.
Two spent the whole time moaning about the time it takes to get away from the ground, comments like ' f having to do this every week' ' all this to get away from this shit hole' etc etc.

15 mins or so later they got to the gate at the platform only to discover that this train goes to Lewes, 'Does it not go to Brighton then? they asks' . You should have seen their little faces when they were told they had to back the other way, cross the bridge and queue for another hour !
 




happypig

happypig

Staring at the rude boys
May 23, 2009
7,956
Eastbourne
A mex eyecan said:
In the queue for Lewes train yesterday several Leicester supporters waiting.
Two spent the whole time moaning about the time it takes to get away from the ground, comments like ' f having to do this every week' ' all this to get away from this shit hole' etc etc.

15 mins or so later they got to the gate at the platform only to discover that this train goes to Lewes, 'Does it not go to Brighton then? they asks' . You should have seen their little faces when they were told they had to back the other way, cross the bridge and queue for another hour !
Click to expand...

Had they any sense they'd have gone to Lewes and got on the first train back.
 


swindonseagull

swindonseagull

Well-known member
Aug 6, 2003
9,262
Swindon, but used to be Manila
jasetheace said:
A different perspective from me. Been down with that dreadful stomach bug all week that affected the Aussie Rugby Team (Don't ask). Felt marginally better yesterday but had to make a judgement call that respected those with and around me. On balance decided not to risk it.

People have lives to live and some are more vulnerable than others.I have a degree of sympathy for those that are frustrated by those that bring illness to public spaces. Stay in bed. Get better. Work from home if you can (and a lot can these days).
Click to expand...

A cough is not always a sign of contagious illness, tickly throat, dry throat etc......if some people are SO vulnerable then may be they should stay away from other people?
 


Knocky's Nose

Knocky's Nose

Mon nez est en Valenciennes..
May 7, 2017
4,137
Eastbourne
ESL : Man in my row usually comes with his Mrs and two teenage kids. Mr & Mrs wear high-end Rolexes, all wear £1,000 coats (even the kids), all never smile, cheer or clap apart from when we score and they all do a Henman style fist-pump, but otherwise they thoroughly look like they'd rather be elsewhere.

They arrived and sat down yesterday on about 8 minutes, left to go to the concourse on 40 minutes, arrived back at their seats at 50 minutes, then left bang on 80 minutes. They do this most games, and it gets right on my tits as I'm constantly standing up to let their miserable faces file past.

I get the distinct feeling they were only there so they can say they were because they can afford to do so. Makes me a bit sad that people do this.

It's not a story - more of a gripe, but I feel better now :D
 


Birdie Boy

Birdie Boy

Well-known member
Jun 17, 2011
4,108
In the north stand toilets pre-game and heard someone say "Propper is in but Stephens is out", second guy says "I don't rate Stephens anyway"!
So firstly they don't know Stephens got sent off in the last game and is banned and he didn't rate him! :ffsparr:
 




H

Hastings gull

Well-known member
Nov 23, 2013
4,635
Knocky's Nose said:
ESL : Man in my row usually comes with his Mrs and two teenage kids. Mr & Mrs wear high-end Rolexes, all wear £1,000 coats (even the kids), all never smile, cheer or clap apart from when we score and they all do a Henman style fist-pump, but otherwise they thoroughly look like they'd rather be elsewhere.

They arrived and sat down yesterday on about 8 minutes, left to go to the concourse on 40 minutes, arrived back at their seats at 50 minutes, then left bang on 80 minutes. They do this most games, and it gets right on my tits as I'm constantly standing up to let their miserable faces file past.

I get the distinct feeling they were only there so they can say they were because they can afford to do so. Makes me a bit sad that people do this.

It's not a story - more of a gripe, but I feel better now :D
Click to expand...

I know how you feel. It was during one match last year, when a family was sitting to my left and the whole match they kept getting up, going to the loo, or fetching something to eat and drink. I must have been up probably about 15 times. OK -it's not the end of the world, but somehow it just starts to become so annoying. I do recall reading about what can happen during Rugby games, as they allow you to bring beer to your seat - sounds good but it can be so annoying when perpetually being asked to let them through to have a tinkle.
 




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