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[Food] Lunch related injury



SouthCoastOwl

New member
May 23, 2013
1,719
Vaux Sur Seine
While changing between my distance and reading glasses I've just poked myself in the eye with a plastic fork I was eating my lunch with:facepalm:.

As I type this with salad dressing smeared over my cheek, blurred vision and tears streaming from my left eye, I wonder has anyone else out there injured themselves while eating lunch? or alternatively has anyone else done anything equally stupid today?
 
Feb 23, 2009
22,771
Brighton factually.....
While changing between my distance and reading glasses I've just poked myself in the eye with a plastic fork I was eating my lunch with:facepalm:.

As I type this with salad dressing smeared over my cheek, blurred vision and tears streaming from my left eye, I wonder has anyone else out there injured themselves while eating lunch? or alternatively has anyone else done anything equally stupid today?

You need a spork
 

beorhthelm

A. Virgo, Football Genius
Jul 21, 2003
35,237
no, but i live in constant fear recently that i will catch my eye with a pen.
 

marlowe

Well-known member
Dec 13, 2015
3,890
While changing between my distance and reading glasses I've just poked myself in the eye with a plastic fork I was eating my lunch with:facepalm:.

As I type this with salad dressing smeared over my cheek, blurred vision and tears streaming from my left eye, I wonder has anyone else out there injured themselves while eating lunch? or alternatively has anyone else done anything equally stupid today?

Count yourself lucky, it could have been worse..

ee49cc78248c925b9bd8cde2ba2ca86d--murder-most-foul-gangster-s.jpg
 

BNthree

Plastic JCL
Sep 14, 2016
10,742
WeHo
We once had a particularly dopey apprentice. Most of them are rather dopey but this one was the worst we ever had. One lunchtime he had one of those microwave burgers. He'd cooked it and went to eat it straight away and duly burnt his mouth. In shock he then dropped the burger into his lap where it started burning his bits. So he grabs it and picks it up again and burns his fingers so drops it into his lap again and starts burning his nuts again. So picks it and burns his fingers so drops it into his lap again. He spent about 30 seconds alternating between burning his fingers and balls before he has the sense to drop it somewhere that wasn't his lap. The rest of us were laughing hysterically at him.
 


edna krabappel

Well-known member
NSC Licker Extraordinaire
Jul 7, 2003
47,215
While changing between my distance and reading glasses I've just poked myself in the eye with a plastic fork I was eating my lunch with:facepalm:.

As I type this with salad dressing smeared over my cheek, blurred vision and tears streaming from my left eye, I wonder has anyone else out there injured themselves while eating lunch? or alternatively has anyone else done anything equally stupid today?


Mine was a dinner-related eye injury, does that count? I was struck in the eye by a flying Ferrero Rocher after a dinner party (and a few drinks), which I was informed by the specialist at the RSCH could lead to permanent loss of vision on that side :)

I've avoided receptions at the Ambassador's ever since, but one the plus side, I made a full recovery.
 


ROSM

Well-known member
Dec 26, 2005
6,161
Just far enough away from LDC
And thats why forks shouldnt be allowed at football matches
 

ROSM

Well-known member
Dec 26, 2005
6,161
Just far enough away from LDC
Not so much as a meal time error but i do know of someone who was caught in the eye by a condom....
 


happypig

Staring at the rude boys
May 23, 2009
7,928
Eastbourne
Not really lunch related and not me but...

A mate of mine woke up one morning and decided to have a cigarette. It was summer and he slept in the nude. He lit the match but the end of it flew off. Quick as a flash he slapped it to put it out but it had landed on his knackers so he caused himself considerable pain.
 

Baldseagull

Well-known member
Jan 26, 2012
10,859
Crawley
Burnt myself on the forehead with a cigarette that was between the fingers of my hand, that were also curled around the bottle of lager I was drinking, the other hand holding my mates beer, who had gone for a lash.
I was 15 and pissed though.
 


Questions

Habitual User
Oct 18, 2006
24,652
Worthing
When McDonalds brought their apple turnover out years back I fell foul of the flipping napalm they put in them. Bad burns.
 


D

Deleted User X18H

Guest
A few years ago I used to work with someone who used to fake seizures. I know they were faked because during one of these ‘episodes’ of supposed incapability, I made the subject laugh.

Any way during another episode a first aider and the person’s boss accompanied them to the lift and onward to the rest facility.

Now this person wasn’t slight in anyway and on their way to lift ‘collapsed’ in stages and fell straight on to their Walkers grab bag, which exploded with some force causing people from other floors to come scurrying to the lift area to see if the bomb alert needed to be activated.

It’s still discussed and heartily laughed about to this day.......last Friday in fact.
 

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