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[Misc] World's Hardest Creature XI: Group B

Who's the hardest?

  • Orca

    Votes: 14 10.9%
  • Sun Bear

    Votes: 8 6.3%
  • Mantis Shrimp

    Votes: 13 10.2%
  • Salt Water Crocodile

    Votes: 27 21.1%
  • Cape Buffalo

    Votes: 2 1.6%
  • Slug

    Votes: 10 7.8%
  • Colossal Squid

    Votes: 10 7.8%
  • Elephant Seal

    Votes: 3 2.3%
  • Grasshopper Mouse

    Votes: 19 14.8%
  • Hippopotamus

    Votes: 22 17.2%

  • Total voters
    128
  • Poll closed .


jimhigham

Je Suis Rhino
Apr 25, 2009
7,692
Woking
Thanks for joining us all at the Animaldome. With Group A underway this year's edition is already off to a flyer, with the Black Swallower holding a surprise lead in the early stages. Can the plucky lunatic keep up the pace?

Now onto Group B. Ladies and gentlemen, please consider the following...

Orca - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Killer_whale
Orca.jpg
It's got killer in its name, which should make the annual nomination of Orca more or less a shoo-in. An apex predator that never finds itself on the menu, the Orca will merrily munch through an impressive list of marine mammals. However, these beasts are also clever. A captive killer whale discovered that by regurgitating its feed onto the water surface it could attract sea birds, which it subsequently ate. The other residents promptly saw this and copied the trick.

Sun Bear - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sun_bear
Sun Bear.jpg
Don't be fooled by the teddy bear appearance. In the Kingdom of Hard the Sun Bear is a player. While not carnivorous, it has fearsome claws and a powerful bite that make it something you might want to consider avoiding. Sun bears are thought to be especially fierce when surprised and a past study of human casualties in India suggested that they tend not to mess around and go straight for your face. Approach with extreme caution.

Mantis Shrimp - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mantis_shrimp
Mantis Shrimp.jpg
A previous WHC winner, the Mantis Shrimp shocked the world when it took the title. In recent times they have picked up the nickname 'thumb splitters' simply through their habit of lacerating incautious human investigators. They are generally aggressive in nature and only tend to venture out of the burrows for a scrap. Although there are many types of mantis shrimp they are largely divided into 'smashers' and 'spearers'. Basically they either bludgeon their prey or stab them. With ridiculous acceleration they can effectively attack twice, firstly with their claws and then with the resultant shock wave, which can be enough by itself to stun or kill. Whoosh!

Salt Water Crocodile - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Saltwater_crocodile
Salt Water Crocodile.jpg
The 'saltie' is the largest of all living reptiles, generally reaching up to six metres in length and weighing just the one ton. The croc is defined as a hypercarnivore; meaning that over 70% of its diet consists of meat. It follows that the SWC should be pretty decent in a barney. The croc will ambush its prey, drown them and swallow them whole and can take on more or less anything that enters its territory. Oh yes, and they also have the highest bite force recorded in any animal: almost four times that of the Spotted Hyena.

Cape Buffalo - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/African_buffalo
Cape Buffalo.jpg
You don't get to be a proud member of The Big Five without having a degree of hardness about you. In the case of the Cape Buffalo most of that hard is concentrated at the head, with the horns fusing to form a 'bone shield' that does serious damage. Cape buffaloes are though to be responsible for goring around 200 people to death each year. A cursory search of YouTube should also uncover any number of documented punch ups with lions, crocodiles and more.

Slug - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Slug
Slug.jpg
The slug is very much the outsider in this contest, it did muster some vociferous support in the nominations phase: possibly from irate gardeners. Anecdotal tales suggest that the West Sussex variety is nothing but mandibles and attitude, although this has yet to be confirmed independently. Slugs are given to eating plants faster than they can grow and once a gardener's ire has been aroused they have proven to be frustratingly resistant to pellets and those weird wool things. May well need a compelling case put forward if it is to progress further in the competition.

Colossal Squid - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Colossal_squid
Colossal Squid.jpg
Giant squid? Nah, this dude is colossal and is the largest known invertebrate. It took one look at its titchy "giant" brethren and said 'I can do better than that'. Instead of tentacles with suckers and tiny teeth the Colossal Squid has upgraded and bears sharp hooks, some of which can swivel and others which are three pointed. It has eyes bigger than Alan Partridge's 'large dinner plate' and just screams epic. Scars found on sperm whales suggest that it can put up a very decent fight against this predator.

Elephant Seal - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Elephant_seal
Elephant Seal.jpg
Here comes a creature that quite fancies a dust up with colossal squid. Following a near miss with extinction in the 19th century, elephant seals have since recovered in number. Southern bulls can typically reach up to 3,000kg and are unperturbed by the harsh environment they hang out in. They can dive over a mile in depth and for over an hour at a time. Their fights are extraordinarily vicious, bloody and not for the faint hearted. YouTube viewings should not be undertaken lightly.

Grasshopper Mouse - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Grasshopper_mouse
Grasshopper Mouse.jpg
A popular contender and surprise package from the past. Despite being... a mouse the grasshopper variety still has what it takes to go deep into WHC proceedings. Its cuddly appearance belies its carnivorous tendencies. The GM takes on toxic centipedes and scorpions, howls to let other mice know to keep the hell out of its territory and, if held captive with others of its kind, will contentedly eat them as a means of getting some peace and quiet. Well 'ard.

Hippopotamus - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hippopotamus
Hippo.jpg
Despite being largely herbivorous and almost genial in appearance when feeding, the Hippo can be one evil brute. The third largest mammal on earth (behind elephants and rhinos) they are thought to be responsible for more human deaths in Africa than any other animal. Their huge size and surprising mobility in water make for an A Class attack sub: a hippos was reportedly responsible for the deaths of 13 people in Niger when it attacked a capsized a boat.

Go!
 

Kalimantan Gull

Well-known member
Aug 13, 2003
12,897
Central Borneo / the Lizard
Sun Bear - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sun_bear

Don't be fooled by the teddy bear appearance. In the Kingdom of Hard the Sun Bear is a player. While not carnivorous, it has fearsome claws and a powerful bite that make it something you might want to consider avoiding. Sun bears are thought to be especially fierce when surprised and a past study of human casualties in India suggested that they tend not to mess around and go straight for your face. Approach with extreme caution.

I have surprised many a sun-bear in the jungles of Borneo and ALL of them have turned tail and run away. NONE of them went for the face. I am NOT HARD. Ergo, the Sun-bear is NOT HARD.

I will re-iterate this point to everyone who champions this non-hard creature.


ALSO - the study of injuries in India was from Sloth-Bear attacks. Different species, much bigger, not overly-aggressive but can give you a good swipe. Grizzlies are the bear I would least like to surprise, you're unlikely to come out of that with a happy story to tell
 

Garry Nelson's Left Foot

Well-known member
Jul 7, 2003
13,037
tokyo
Holy Shitmas! This group is insane! There have only ever been seven WHC champions and FOUR of them are in this group. Along with last years runner up.

Christ on a bike I don't know what to do.
 






jimhigham

Je Suis Rhino
Apr 25, 2009
7,692
Woking
A very even opening to this group. Will VAR be required to work out whether or not there was contact between the shrimp and the mouse?

Off to work for the day. Will be very interested to see where the NSC family has taken this when I get home.
 


Badger

NOT the Honey Badger
NSC Licker Extraordinaire
May 8, 2007
12,734
Toronto
This is madness. We need to introduce a seeding system next year.

Grasshopper Mouse all the way.
 

Garry Nelson's Left Foot

Well-known member
Jul 7, 2003
13,037
tokyo
The best thing about the grasshopper mouse is that it ROARS.

Technically it HOWLS, I believe. Like a wolf.

And kills and EATS any of its kin that step foot in its ridiculously large territory.

And they kill and eat poisonous centipedes(whose poison CAN kill the mouse).

And they're basically ultra aggressive head mentals of the highest degree.

This competition NEEDS the grasshopper mouse(and hippo and croc) to progress.
 

Kalimantan Gull

Well-known member
Aug 13, 2003
12,897
Central Borneo / the Lizard
Technically it HOWLS, I believe. Like a wolf.

And kills and EATS any of its kin that step foot in its ridiculously large territory.

And they kill and eat poisonous centipedes(whose poison CAN kill the mouse).

And they're basically ultra aggressive head mentals of the highest degree.

This competition NEEDS the grasshopper mouse(and hippo and croc) to progress.

I think it needs it to be squashed. Mercilessly. Like under the feet of the hippo, or in the jaws of the croc.
 


jimhigham

Je Suis Rhino
Apr 25, 2009
7,692
Woking
This group is ridiculous. Where is the group A thread btw?!

My cock up what with me being new at this and basically not being very good at it. You can find it here. It is a bit of a mess. Apologies.

http://www.northstandchat.com/showthread.php?360263-World-s-Hardest-Creature-XI-Intro

Now that WHC has been around a few years there are quite a lot of crowd favourites around and I would suggest that all of the groups are going to result in the ejection of some big names.
 

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