Cracker Jokes

D

Diablo

Well-known member

NSC Patron

Sep 22, 2014

4,187

lewes

• Dec 27, 2016

• #1

My favourite.


.What did the pirate say on his eightieth birthday ??..................................Aye Matey

 

AmexRuislip

Trainee Spy 🕵️‍♂️

Feb 2, 2014

33,801

Ruislip

• Dec 27, 2016

• #2

What did the grape say when stepped on?

He let out a little whine

 

Biscuit Barrel

Well-known member

Jan 28, 2014

2,424

Southwick

• Dec 27, 2016

• #3

Why did the teacher go boss eyed?

Because she couldn't control her pupils.

 

P

portslade seagull

Well-known member

Jul 19, 2003

17,606

portslade

• Dec 27, 2016

• #4

Crystal Palace !!!

 

BN9 BHA

DOCKERS

NSC Patron

Jul 14, 2013

21,530

Newhaven

• Dec 27, 2016

• #5

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.
Knock, knock, who's there? Not Sally.

Think my crackers came from the pound shop.

 

Tony Towner's Fridge

Well-known member

Aug 22, 2003

5,384

GLASGOW,SCOTLAND,UK

• Dec 28, 2016

• #6

What's the fastest thing on dry land?

Stevie Wonder in a speedboat.


TNBA

TTF

 

C

Cheeky Monkey

Well-known member

Jul 17, 2003

23,033

• Dec 29, 2016

• #7

Got ours from Lidl this year:

What have the planet Mercury and the all seater American Express Community Stadium got in common?

Neither has an atmosphere.

 

Magic Sponge

Well-known member

Jun 17, 2011

1,140

House In The Hill

• Dec 29, 2016

• #8

Why didn't Rudolf or Prancer sell on eBay?

Because they were too dear.

 

Goldstone1976

We Got Calde in!!

Helpful Moderator

NSC Patron

Apr 30, 2013

13,783

Herts

• Dec 29, 2016

• #9

He made very few; was occasionally good for a decent horse tip though.

 

WATFORD zero

Well-known member

NSC Patron

Jul 10, 2003

25,796

• Dec 29, 2016

• #10

 

D

darkwolf666

Well-known member

Nov 8, 2015

7,576

Sittingbourne, Kent

• Dec 29, 2016

• #11

Why didn't Rudolph appear on Strictly - because he's no Dancer! (M&S)

 

Coldeanseagull

Opinionated

Mar 13, 2013

7,769

Coldean

• Dec 29, 2016

• #12

Cheeky Monkey said:

Got ours from Lidl this year:

What have the planet Mercury and the all seater American Express Community Stadium got in common?

Neither has an atmosphere.

Click to expand...

Wow, a pikey that can read

 

Bognor Bystander

Looking for a new job

Oct 7, 2010

842

Bognor Regis

• Dec 29, 2016

• #13

What did the Scarf say to the Hat ?

I'll hang around here and you go on ahead ...