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Right To The Remotet



el punal

Well-known member
Last night the unblemished years of marriage to the memsahib nearly came to an abrupt halt. There I was cosily sat on the sofa contemplating which match to watch on TV, Brentford v Fulham or Eastleigh v Swindon. The good lady wife enquires " What are you watching? ", " Football. " I reply. Snorts of derision came in my direction, a verbal volley of " all you ever watch is football, or what you want to watch, you never ask me, men always control the remote, blah, blah, ". Ouch!

Then it happened, the breaking of the unwritten rule. She gets the TV remote and goes onto recorded programmes and decides to watch . . . . Australian Masterchef!!! The only time she watches this colonial gunk is when I am happily away watching the Albion in action. Not only that, but she's recorded 46 (forty six!) episodes of wannabes spit roasting kangaroos or whatever other crazy culinary nightmare.
TThe If
 




spence

British and Proud
Oct 15, 2014
9,811
Crawley
My missus records all episodes of Four in a bed and come dine with me. Must be a woman's thing.
 


Cheshire Cat

The most curious thing..
Are you lying on the floor in a pool of blood while she demonstrates how to gut a koala?
 






Captain Sensible

Well-known member
Jul 8, 2003
6,435
Not the real one
Get two televisions? It works for us. He watches films, and I watch football.

Yes, although it's not always that simple. The TV in our living room was taken over by the kids, then the TV in the bedroom was already taken over by the wife, so I put a TV in the lounge and that got taken by my eldest daughter when she got into iplayer and on demand. So when we got a new kitchen I put a tv on the wall, I was happy there for a while as it was near the fridge for beer, but then the wife migrated to the kitchen because 'she cooks and it's her room' news to me, I can see it's because she sits in there next to the wine fridge watching the Kardashians. So by that time my eldest had moved upstairs to the bedroom and my youngest in the lounge and the Large 55in living room tv was free again. Happy days!!!
 


Thunder Bolt

Ordinary Supporter
Yes, although it's not always that simple. The TV in our living room was taken over by the kids, then the TV in the bedroom was already taken over by the wife, so I put a TV in the lounge and that got taken by my eldest daughter when she got into iplayer and on demand. So when we got a new kitchen I put a tv on the wall, I was happy there for a while as it was near the fridge for beer, but the wife then migrated to the kitchen because 'she cooks and it's her room' news to me, I can see it's because she sits in there next to the wine fridge. So by that time my eldest had moved upstairs to the bedroom and my youngest in the lounge and the Large 55in living room tv was free again. Happy days!!!

My kids have grown up and left home, so that's not an issue now.
 


Merdalfthewizard

once more unto the breach
Dec 25, 2014
181
265 miles from home games
We solved the problem by having 2 houses. Football in mine, everything else in hers. It nearly came to blows during the Olympics as the good lady made me watch the swimming (and not just the ladies!)
I must admit I backed down from the argument. My father always advised me "never get involved in a fight you haven't got at least a 70% chance of winning"
 








Coldeanseagull

Opinionated
Mar 13, 2013
7,716
Coldean
I saw the 2 minutes between the first two posts and thought.....yep they've kissed and made up.....which probably accounts for the remote control holder being put into use???
 




AmexRuislip

Trainee Spy 🕵️‍♂️
Feb 2, 2014
33,727
Ruislip
I'm off to A&E to have the TV remote surgically removed from my rectum.

Well try not to cough, pass wind or any other involuntary movement whilst in the hospital, as you'll have all the crazies that watch the A&E tv confused over all the constant channel changes :facepalm:
 


el punal

Well-known member
Well try not to cough, pass wind or any other involuntary movement whilst in the hospital, as you'll have all the crazies that watch the A&E tv confused over all the constant channel changes :facepalm:

Just as well I didn't eat a curry otherwise they'd be watching a medical version of the film 'Passage to India'. :ohmy:
 






GoldWithFalmer

Seaweed! Seaweed!
Apr 24, 2011
12,687
SouthCoast





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