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Care home advice



It has come to the time when my elderly (90 and 87) parents would really like to be in a care home being looked after rather than struggling to stay independent. We have found somewhere nice and have fingers crossed that a vacancy will become available. Being the sole Potting offspring it is down to me to sort things out - have already got Powers of Attorney organised and registered to simplify things.

I am sure that there must be some on this forum who have "been there, done that" and I would welcome advice on your experiences. I would also welcome any views on the various "financial advisers" that have been promoted to us and the sort of products that they are likely to promote to ensure that (being optimistic) my parents's liquid assets and house, when sold, will last them a good few years.

Eyes have just stopped watering from learning how much a decent care home costs per week!
 

Half Time Pies

Well-known member
Sep 7, 2003
1,402
Brighton
I own a home care company so come in to contact with homes quite regularly. Not sure if your parents live in East Sussex but the following link will allow you to download the care choices directory which contains a list of all the care homes in the county, on page 34 onwards there is also a guide and a checklist about the things to look for when selecting a home.

http://www.carechoices.co.uk/wp-con...x-Care-Support-Services-Directory-2015-16.pdf

I would try to acertain what sort of the environment your parents would be happiest in. Some new care homes are large purpose built and designed to look like expensive hotels or the inside of cruise liners, they have a very professional set up for impressing new clients and you might get blown away when you go around them however remember that these types of environments aren't for everyone. Some may prefer a smaller homely and traditional feel and remember that your parents will be in there 24/7.

I have been in some of the most expensive care homes out there which look fantastic on the face of it but have questionable levels of care and others that look a bit tired but have fantastic staff and management in place.

Have a really good look around and talk to management, are they someone that you would trust to look after your parents well? In my experience a care home is only as good as its manager. Look at the staff do they look rushed off their feet or do they have the time to sit and talk to the residents. How long have the staff and management been working there? A high turn over of staff could indicate underlying problems. Do they genuinely want to know about your parents as people and their situation or are they just trying to sell you a product? Try to also look at things on the preriphery such as how are the gardens kept and are things well maintained. If these things are not up to scratch then it could either be a sign of poor management or lack on investment from owners.

Another thing that is also often forgotten is how does the home maintain the freedom and choice of residents, do they have the opportunity to go out of the home for example? are there organised trips or activities. Can they get someone to accompany them to appointments etc. In our home care company we look to try to maintain peoples independence for as long as possible, not just taking over but helping people to facilitate doing things for themselves and giving them choices, making sure that we look at what people want and who they are not just their physical needs. Sometimes these types of crucial things are ignored by some care providers.

Finally, have a look at the CQC rating for the home, ideally you are looking for a good or outstanding rating. http://www.cqc.org.uk/content/care-homes

I hope hat this helps however If you would like any further more specific advise then let me know. Finding trusted care companies in this environment of reducing budgets and increasing legislation can be a bit of a minefield.
 

Baldseagull

Well-known member
Jan 26, 2012
10,859
Crawley
A gentleman my parents met on a cruise ship, had decided to spend the rest of his days cruising, he was well looked after on board and it was a lower cost than the care homes, I guess this would depend on the level of care required though.
 

happypig

Staring at the rude boys
May 23, 2009
7,928
Eastbourne
Just gone through it with my mother-in-law.
I agree that at first glance the cost can be shocking but I'd suggest drawing up a basic account of what income they have and what their outgoings will be to see how long thier savings will last.
Do they have thier own home ? If so, would they be happy to rent it out to provide further income ?
 


Triggaaar

Well-known member
Oct 24, 2005
49,900
Goldstone
A gentleman my parents met on a cruise ship, had decided to spend the rest of his days cruising, he was well looked after on board and it was a lower cost than the care homes, I guess this would depend on the level of care required though.
Surely he can't have needed that much care? Were they responsible for ensuring he took his medicines, getting him up each morning etc? It doesn't sound anything like a care home.
 

LamieRobertson

Not awoke
Feb 3, 2008
46,415
SHOREHAM BY SEA
It has come to the time when my elderly (90 and 87) parents would really like to be in a care home being looked after rather than struggling to stay independent. We have found somewhere nice and have fingers crossed that a vacancy will become available. Being the sole Potting offspring it is down to me to sort things out - have already got Powers of Attorney organised and registered to simplify things.

I am sure that there must be some on this forum who have "been there, done that" and I would welcome advice on your experiences. I would also welcome any views on the various "financial advisers" that have been promoted to us and the sort of products that they are likely to promote to ensure that (being optimistic) my parents's liquid assets and house, when sold, will last them a good few years.

Eyes have just stopped watering from learning how much a decent care home costs per week!

Wishing you all the best ..it's not easy but that post from half time pies is a big help...and you sorting that POA out was a good step.
 


Baldseagull

Well-known member
Jan 26, 2012
10,859
Crawley
Surely he can't have needed that much care? Were they responsible for ensuring he took his medicines, getting him up each morning etc? It doesn't sound anything like a care home.

Some folk just need someone to cook for them, and not to have to bother with doing shopping, cleaning etc. not everyone in a care home needs medical attention. As the O.P.'s parents are currently at home, they may just be struggling a bit with day to day chores, rather than needing bed baths and nursing care.
 

Fungus

Well-known member
NSC Licker Extraordinaire
May 21, 2004
7,033
Truro
Surely he can't have needed that much care? Were they responsible for ensuring he took his medicines, getting him up each morning etc? It doesn't sound anything like a care home.

Sounds more like a floating retirement home.
 

mr sheen

Well-known member
Jan 17, 2008
1,551
Some folk just need someone to cook for them, and not to have to bother with doing shopping, cleaning etc. not everyone in a care home needs medical attention. As the O.P.'s parents are currently at home, they may just be struggling a bit with day to day chores, rather than needing bed baths and nursing care.
Having recently worked with elderly prisoners with social care needs, I think they get cheaper care in that environment than in many care homes. And it's often carried out by better trained, higher skilled workers. Course, the downside is they have to be in prison, but the inheritance gets protected.
 


Triggaaar

Well-known member
Oct 24, 2005
49,900
Goldstone
Some folk just need someone to cook for them, and not to have to bother with doing shopping, cleaning etc
Then he didn't go on a cruise ship instead of a retirement home, he went on a ship instead of getting a carer to pop in.
As the O.P.'s parents are currently at home, they may just be struggling a bit with day to day chores, rather than needing bed baths and nursing care.
If that's all it is, they don't need a home at all. Then there's a step up for those who need residential care, then a step up for those who need a nursing home.
 
Thanks to all for their input on this, have found a home very close to us which has a good "feel" about it - was impressed by the enthusiasm of the staff who showed me round and my parents like the feel of the place - helped by a couple of the residents who chatted to them. Have taken on board the various comments and fingers crossed will be able to move forward with it.
 

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