Ernest
Stupid IDIOT
I never thought when I MENTIONED I was HOLDING a TRIBUTE night for BURNO that it would TAKE off and it would become the HOTTEST ticket in TOWN. It's ALL systems GO for Sunday 17th April at the CLIFTONVILLE where we have a FULL English BREAKFAST served TAPPERS style including EXTRA Sausage and BLACK pudding, some lovely FLAMINGO music whilst we EAT and then after the PRESENTATION to BURNO it is CABARET time. At GRATE expense we have TWO lovely SPANISH senoritas for some EXOTIC dancing and one of them is STICKY Vicky from Bennydorm's GRANDDAUGHTER who has PROMISED to do some UNSPEAKABLE things with my SAUSAGE and to COMPLETE a memorable EVENING we have a JULIO Inglecias TRIBUTE act as he is BURNO's favourite SIGNER.
I was told there was another EVENT that night but it can't be IMPORTANT as the HOLE Albion SQUAD are coming to BURNO's do, MAYBE they were thinking about some do in the GREEN Pig when AL and AIDE , the Albion RAW duo who put the DULL into DULLARD are having a MANKY bowl of SOOP and CHARGING Forty NOTES for it which is IRONIC.
Anyway I was just FINISHING my Full ENGLISH and I must ADMIT I found the last bit of SAUSAGE a STRUGGLE to get DOWN when my SAUCE turned UP breathless with EXCITEMENT. I had to ASK the latest NEWS about BANG and I was SHOCKED when I heard what has HAPPENED. This ZIKO disease has SHRUNK his head so MUCH now it is the SIZE of a TENNIS ball but he HAS now grown MASSIVE dreadlocks so his HEAD looks NORMAL size and will be in the TEAM anytime NOW. You don't get SCOOPS like that from Andy NAILHER do you ?
With that my SAUCE shot out of the CLIFTONVILLE into the THRONGING masses of George Street whilst I had a NICE cup of TEA to WASH the TASTE of HP Sauce from my MOUTH.
UP THE ARS
I was told there was another EVENT that night but it can't be IMPORTANT as the HOLE Albion SQUAD are coming to BURNO's do, MAYBE they were thinking about some do in the GREEN Pig when AL and AIDE , the Albion RAW duo who put the DULL into DULLARD are having a MANKY bowl of SOOP and CHARGING Forty NOTES for it which is IRONIC.
Anyway I was just FINISHING my Full ENGLISH and I must ADMIT I found the last bit of SAUSAGE a STRUGGLE to get DOWN when my SAUCE turned UP breathless with EXCITEMENT. I had to ASK the latest NEWS about BANG and I was SHOCKED when I heard what has HAPPENED. This ZIKO disease has SHRUNK his head so MUCH now it is the SIZE of a TENNIS ball but he HAS now grown MASSIVE dreadlocks so his HEAD looks NORMAL size and will be in the TEAM anytime NOW. You don't get SCOOPS like that from Andy NAILHER do you ?
With that my SAUCE shot out of the CLIFTONVILLE into the THRONGING masses of George Street whilst I had a NICE cup of TEA to WASH the TASTE of HP Sauce from my MOUTH.
UP THE ARS