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***WHC IX: Quarter final 1***

Hardest beast?


  • Total voters
    99
  • Poll closed .


Garry Nelson's Left Foot

Well-known member
Jul 7, 2003
13,054
tokyo
If you're wearing a hat, hold on to it because a storm is a brewin'. It's quarter final time and no quarter is going to be asked or given in these upcoming match ups. We have the eight most ferocious, aggressive, powerful, vicious, **** you attitude dismember beasts of 2016.

We want to find the hardest. Pound for pound. Who's got it all? Who's got the aggression to go with the raw power to go with the terrifying strength to go with the you might hurt me but I'm going to kill you attitude?

Both of our first quarter finalists have it in bucketfuls but there can only be one winner. That is your responsibilty. Exercise it wisely.

The combatants:

The Hippo

hippo-mouth_1440541c.jpg

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hippopotamus

WHC IX performance:

2nd round: Beat Cassowary 61-43
Group E: 1st 30votes(25.86)

I'm running out of things to say about the Hippo. He's in his ninth consecutive quarter final and of the previous eight he's been in he's won seven. He's the 2010 champion. He's the third largest land mammal on earth and has the strength and power to go with it. His ace in the pack is his raw aggression. He's basically a herbivore(he has been known to eat carrion but not often and only if he stumbles across it and there's nothing else to eat). He's not particularly terrotorial either. So you might assume he's just a placid, lumbering BFG. You'd be so, so wrong. He is, in fact, a huge mound of muscular rage, possessing a distinctly unpredictable and volatile personality, he will attack anything just for the heck of it, because the mood takes him. And by anything, I mean literally anything. He lives in a part of the world teeming with not just deadly predators but apex predators. He will attack them. Not the other way around. He will attack them. So they, apex predators and all, do their best to stay out of his way. What's that passing 100 metres away in the river? A boat? He'll have that too. Yes, he attacks passing boats. Destroys them.


Vs


Wolverine

maxresdefault.jpg

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wolverine

WHC IX performance:

2nd round: Beat Mantis Shrimp 67-40
Group B: 1st 30 votes (28.3%)

So hard there is a superhero named after him, the wolverine is having a wonderful tournament. So far he has defeated two former champs- the black mamba in group B and then WHC VII champion Mantis Shrimp in the second round. Now he's up against the 2010 champion. Facing the best brings out the best in this ferocious, vicious little killing machine with a strength that is disproportionate to its size. He is well known for taking on and killing animals many times his size and has even been reported taking on bears. If he is hunting you, you're in big, big trouble. Hide up a tree? He'll climb up after you. Get out in the river? He's swimming after you? Hide under twenty foot of arctic snow? This little ****er can smell you and will dig down and kill you. Then eat you. And leave nothing of you to be remembered by. He's already seen off two champions; is his heady mix of ferocity, abnormal strength and willingness to fight and kill much bigger beasts enough to see off a third?
 




Badger

NOT the Honey Badger
NSC Patreon
May 8, 2007
12,750
Toronto
Wolverine for me, he doesn't care if he wins, he'll still take you all on.

I'd LOVE to see a Wolverine vs Grasshopper Mouse final.
 


perseus

Broad Blue & White stripe
Jul 5, 2003
23,454
Sūþseaxna
Hippo is slow in more ways than one. A bit dim witted as well. Not hard, wet!
 






Garry Nelson's Left Foot

Well-known member
Jul 7, 2003
13,054
tokyo
This is probably the toughest tie to decide on. When I was writing about the Hippo I thought 'yeah, he's probably going to win this, he's an absolute beast'. But then I started writing about the Wolverine and completely changed my mind. I re-read it all before posting and changed my mind back to the hippo....and then back to wolverine. I'm going to have to wait and see if anyone can convince me one way or the other.
 


Guinness Boy

Tofu eating wokerati
Helpful Moderator
NSC Patreon
Jul 23, 2003
33,821
Up and Coming Sunny Portslade
I'm going for the wolverine based purely on the fact that as a large vegetarian the hippo reminds me of my old Art Teacher.
 










mejonaNO12 aka riskit

Well-known member
Dec 4, 2003
21,481
England
What a match this is.

The wolverine just has that air of DIRTY about him. Just a nasty little dick who would stop at nothing to rip you up.
 




Bladders

Twats everywhere
Jun 22, 2012
13,672
The Troubadour
Has a Hippo ever ran away................from anything? I'm pretty sure a Wolverine has.

Hippo.
 




JJ McClure

Go Jags
Jul 7, 2003
10,813
Hassocks
Toughest match-up so far. I just can't choose. It's gonna be a close my eyes and click moment.
 




beefypigeon

Well-known member
Aug 14, 2008
959
I'm yet to have seen any actual evidence of the Wolverine's hardness... So currently leaning slightly towards the Hippo but could be easily convinced otherwise.
 


Giraffe

VERY part time moderator
Helpful Moderator
NSC Patreon
Aug 8, 2005
26,456
Hippo. He can kill you just by sitting on you.

I base my vote on which animal would I least want to be stuck in a small room with. You would have no chance against Hippo, whereas a Wolverine could be killed with a good kick to the head.
 


Garry Nelson's Left Foot

Well-known member
Jul 7, 2003
13,054
tokyo
24 hours left. Wolverine currently has the lead and is on course to defeat his third former WHC champion in three rounds. Terrific effort by the little fella if he pulls off the victory.
 


Tom Hark Preston Park

Will Post For Cash
Jul 6, 2003
69,880
Wolverine beat a SHRIMP FFS in an earlier round while in the same round Hippo beat the evil-clawed Cassowary. Why are we even TALKING about this as a credible contest? ???
 






Mellotron

I've asked for soup
Jul 2, 2008
31,730
Brighton
Tricky one. I have been swayed slightly back into favour of the Hippo generally by the fact he starts utterly pointless fights just because he's angry.

However, his size, power and weight advantages etc go massively AGAINST him. So, Wolverine.
 



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