Joke du Jour

Bombadier Botty · Aug 21, 2015

A guy goes into the Canada Post Office to apply for a job.
The interviewer asks him, "Are you allergic to anything?"
He replies, "Yes, caffeine. I can't drink coffee."
"Ok, Have you ever been in the military service?"
"Yes," he says, "I was in Afghanistan for one tour."
The interviewer says, "That will give you five extra points toward employment." Then he asks, "Are you disabled in any way?"
The guy says, "Yes. A bomb exploded near me and I lost both my testicles."
The interviewer grimaces and then says, "Disabled in your country's service!
Well, that qualifies for extra bonus points. Okay. Looking at the regulations you have got enough points for me to hire you right now.
Our normal hours are from 8:00 a.m. to 4:00 p.m. You can start tomorrow at 10:00 am, and plan on starting at 10:00 am every day.
" The guy is puzzled and asks, "If the work hours are from 8:00 am to 4:00 PM, why don't you want me here until 10:00 am?"
"This is a government job," the interviewer says. "For the first two hours, we just stand around drinking coffee and scratching our balls. No point in you coming in for that."

Ken Livingstone Seagull · Aug 21, 2015

Bombadier Botty said:
A guy goes into the Canada Post Office to apply for a job.... "If the work hours are from 8:00 am to 4:00 PM, why don't you want me here until 10:00 am?" "This is a government job," the interviewer says. "For the first two hours, we just stand around drinking coffee and scratching our balls. No point in you coming in for that."

Hmmm. I think the joke could be improved if you pointed out up front that Canada Post Office is also known as Postes Canada for us bi-linguists (oooh missus). Also, that it was formerly known as Royal Mail Canada so as to avoid any confusion for us old-timers.

In addition, I notice that the CPO hours are listed as 8 to 4. At least in the metropolitan Ottawa CPOs, the opening hours are 8 to 5, so Shirley some mistake here?

:moo:

Juan Albion · Aug 21, 2015

The post office is open until 5pm. Who is present for the final hour?

ExmouthExile · Aug 21, 2015

Can't he just drink hot chocolate? or tea?

MattBackHome · Aug 21, 2015

Seems an extremely spurious interview technique.

Juan Albion · Aug 21, 2015

This whole premise fails early on in the effort, since anyone knows that, in fact, 8-10 are probably the busiest hours of the day in the post office as the mail arrives and has to be placed in the right boxes.

Stumpy Tim · Aug 21, 2015

I don't believe any bomb has been built that could just blow off two testicles, and no other body part. The applicant is clearly a liar, and yet there is no mention of reference checking. If it was me, that's the first thing I would do after interviewing this chap

Goldstone1976 · Aug 21, 2015

The Crown Corporation is called the Canada Post Corporation. There is no legitimate business called the Canada Post Office; it must be a front for the Taliban who have set up an elaborate front company to finish the job they started when the applicant was in Afghanistan. One would have thought that an ex-military man would have been smart enough to have figured this out. Therefore, he's clearly not ex-military; hes just an idle layabout.

Hampster Gull · Aug 21, 2015

Perhaps he could scratch someone else's testicles? Otherwise this feels like discrimination and i would suggest he goes to an employment lawyer.

South Stand Bonfire · Aug 21, 2015

Canada Post is a privatised company and no longer part of the Government . Clearly the Op' s research is flawed and doubt has to be cast on the authenticity of this interview.

Greg Bobkin · Aug 21, 2015

The interviewer's tone suggests there are no female employees - unless they have balls - which is rocky ground from a legal point of view.

skipper734 · Aug 21, 2015

What do the female employees do whilst all this ball scratching is going on? Sounds like straightforward discrimination to me.

fat old seagull · Aug 21, 2015

Hampster Gull said:
Perhaps he could scratch someone else's testicles? Otherwise this feels like discrimination and i would suggest he goes to an employment lawyer.

Personally I think the Employment Lawyer should scratch his own balls! Unless it's a woman, then she can scratch mine...gently.

crasher · Aug 21, 2015

You say he goes in to the post office to apply for a job.

But wouldn't he have had to submit his application first, before they invited him in for an interview? It doesn't sound like modern HR practice to me.

Titanic · Aug 21, 2015

Seems rather harsh... I'm pretty sure that the scarred and mangled remains of his scrotum would be pretty itchy!

Man of Harveys · Aug 21, 2015

Stumpy Tim said:
I don't believe any bomb has been built that could just blow off two testicles, and no other body part.

That's the main point here, I think. I can only really speak for myself but I'm pretty sure that most men's penises are in front of their scrotal sack, not behind.

Assuming he was standing facing the explosion, surely his penis would therefore sustain far more damage than his testes. And if he was facing away from it, I suspect that his buttocks would have absorbed at least some of the impact before his balls were hit so badly that they actually became detached. His version of events just doesn't make sense.

But - I did once meet someone whose balls were SHOT off in WW2, at Monte Cassino. Maybe that's what he meant to say but he got confused.

Stumpy Tim · Aug 21, 2015

Man of Harveys said:
But - I did once meet someone whose balls were SHOT off in WW2, at Monte Cassino. Maybe that's what he meant to say but he got confused.

Who wants to hire someone "confused"? Certainly not without reference checking.

Tom Bombadil · Aug 21, 2015

Man of Harveys said:
That's the main point here, I think. I can only really speak for myself but I'm pretty sure that most men's penises are in front of their scrotal sack, not behind.

Assuming he was standing facing the explosion, surely his penis would therefore sustain far more damage than his testes. And if he was facing away from it, I suspect that his buttocks would have absorbed at least some of the impact before his balls were hit so badly that they actually became detached. His version of events just doesn't make sense.

But - I did once meet someone whose balls were SHOT off in WW2, at Monte Cassino. Maybe that's what he meant to say but he got confused.

Could be some sort of nad seeking missiles

Biscuit · Aug 21, 2015

I feel light he'd feel a bit excluded in this role. He may not be able to join in on the ball-scratching and coffee-guzzling but I'm sure he'd appreciate the opportunity to socialise with his colleges?

Starting his job in this way is setting off on a slippery slope IMO. He'll soon harbour feelings of isolation which, ultimately, is bad for him and the employer.

fat old seagull · Aug 21, 2015

Well, reading the absolutely bizarre posts that we (including me) have put on this thread this morning. It's pretty damn certain none of us would have got the job either ...balls or not.

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