The OFFICIAL Friday Night Penalty Prediction Thread

edna krabappel · Apr 8, 2015

Following typically shambolic penalty decisions in our previous two home games against Lovely Eddie's side (not to mention the two red cards in the match against his Burnley team), along with Bournemouth's spectacular spot-kick-winning form this season so far, the inevitability of such an occurrence on Friday is so depressing, we might as well make some sport out of it.

Your task, therefore, is quite simple. Predict the minute in which said spot kick will be awarded by Mr Pawson (or "Pawsey" as he's known in Dorset), and provide a little detail as to the likely circumstances. If you think there will be more than one, feel free to elaborate.
[MENTION=3488]withdeanwombat[/MENTION] has already contributed the following on another thread:
"32nd minute- a 5.6 pirouette by............hmmm......Harry After, (unmarked), two yards out of the area followed by half a dozen roll polls towards the 6 yard box. Absolute stonewall penalty."

I shall therefore go for the following: 18th minute: handball decision against Yann Kermorgant (who Pawsey mistakenly confuses with Rohan Ince), occurring 9 yards outside the Albion penalty area, after the game had already been stopped because Lovely Eddie didn't like the consistency of the referee's vanishing spray.

I also fancy a second, 84th minute spot-kick, awarded because....erm...Bruno is a Libra and Lovely Eddie is a Sagittarius and they're incompatible due to the moon being in Aquarius on Friday.

Postman Pat · Apr 8, 2015

37th minute, Dunk clears the ball and a blade of grass hits Matt Ritchie, he falls to the floor clutching his face and Pawson points to the spot and sends off Dunk.

Hotchilidog · Apr 8, 2015

Dammit I was going to go for the Bruno Libra/Howe sagittarius one.

43rd minute Calum Wilson heading for the corner flag with Dunk once again not close enough to make a tackle, but perfectly placed to fell him with a Paddington Bear like hard stare.

Badger · Apr 8, 2015

After a GUTSY first half performance from the Albion, comfortably denying Bournemouth any real goalscoring opportunities the board goes up for just ONE added on minute. A speculative ball is HOOFED towards the Albion box and Matt Ritchie climbs all over Greg Halford to try and get his head to the ball. The ball goes sailing harmlessly out for a goal kick but WAIT, Pawsey blows his whistle and points to the spot. Some OBVIOUS shirt pulling has occurred denying his BELOVED Bournemouth a chance of grabbing the lead at the end of the half, this injustice needs rectifying.

LamieRobertson · Apr 8, 2015

Hotchilidog said:
Dammit I was going to go for the Bruno Libra/Howe sagittarius one.

43rd minute Calum Wilson heading for the corner flag with Dunk once again not close enough to make a tackle, but perfectly placed to fell him with a Paddington Bear like hard stare.

i think you should add that Wilson was at least ten feet outside the penalty area

cardboard · Apr 8, 2015

Minute 9 - Chicken lickin (Richie) falls over in the box after a gust of wind blows his hair and catches the 10" masterpiece and slams him and his 8 stone frame into the turf, O'grady is penalised even though he is 65 yards away chasing lost causes (slowly).

Minute 12 - Kermagent (sp) catches his stud in the turf near the half way line and a clear pen is given.

The crowd is under 8k before half time

blue'n'white · Apr 8, 2015

Callum Wilson handballs in our area in the 14th minute
Ref deliberately mistakes him for Ince, sends Ince off, Wilson scores resultant penalty and B'muff go on to win 4-0

edna krabappel · Apr 8, 2015

Hotchilidog said:
Dammit I was going to go for the Bruno Libra/Howe sagittarius one.

43rd minute Calum Wilson heading for the corner flag with Dunk once again not close enough to make a tackle, but perfectly placed to fell him with a Paddington Bear like hard stare.

Loving your Paddington Bear work :clap2:

GreersElbow · Apr 8, 2015

31st minute, Ritchie goes down because of Joe Bennett's facial hair.

edna krabappel · Apr 8, 2015

GreersElbow said:
31st minute, Ritchie goes down because of Joe Bennett's facial hair.

What, actual contact? Are you MAD?

glasfryn · Apr 8, 2015

Cook flattens KLL in their area then stamps on KLL
Pawson blows his whistle and points to their area with only the goalkeeper there giving them a penalty

Nathan · Apr 8, 2015

I will go with a simple off the ball handbags with Bruno or Dunk, with Ritchie rolling around like he has had his face smashed in by a bulldozer. Obviously outside the area, but Pawson points to the spot, wasn't sure if it was Bruno or Dunk, so sends dunk off and gives Bruno a yellow (knowing he will be giving him another yellow before the half is out). Also, all this happens in the 11th Minute.

EDIT:
When i say handbags, i mean no contact.

Guinness Boy · Apr 8, 2015

24th minute. From a hurried back pass by Bruno Stockdale attempts a quick, first time clearance. He only manages to HEFT the ball in to Leon Best's arse (which has doubled in size since arriving due to an unfortunate action to splinters ratio) and the ball bounces slowly in for a hapless own goal. Matt Ritchie falls about laughing in the area, at which point Pawsey allows the goal to stand but awards a penalty as there's clearly one of Eddie's boys in distress in the box, so to speak.

Prince Monolulu · Apr 8, 2015

You DO know that one of these creative and well conceived, ridiculous prophecies is going to become a reality don't you?

madinthehead · Apr 8, 2015

43 rd minute..
Somehow out of nowhere the Albion have managed to go 1-0 up. Cook handles in his area, not given and the ball is cleared up field a few passes later and Kenwyne Jones gives the ball away needlessly in our box, as he does so he slips on a blade of grass, Dunk, who was only 10 yards away from him was clearly the player who fouled him.. Red card dunk, Bmuff equalise, we should have been given a pen in the build up, but this fades into insignificance as we end up losing 4-1

Everest · Apr 8, 2015

1 second
Pawson thinks that the keeper clapping to focus the side is too loud and likely to incite the AFCB crowd (even though they're too far away to see it). The shockwave from the clapping is also enough in Pawson's mind to prevent any AFCB player from moving forward.
Result - penalty and red card.

#BlameStockdale

Hotchilidog · Apr 8, 2015

madinthehead said:
43 rd minute..
Somehow out of nowhere the Albion have managed to go 1-0 up. Cook handles in his area, not given and the ball is cleared up field a few passes later and Kenwyne Jones gives the ball away needlessly in our box, as he does so he slips on a blade of grass, Dunk, who was only 10 yards away from him was clearly the player who fouled him.. Red card dunk, Bmuff equalise, we should have been given a pen in the build up, but this fades into insignificance as we end up losing 4-1

Nailed it.

Ernest · Apr 8, 2015

91st minute 0-0 and Albion have a throw in near the Bournemouth box, Halford HURLS it in and the gust from the ball FELLS Wilson who is on the half way line, Pawsey still gives them a penalty despite him being 50 yards outside the box and to make matters worse sends off Calderon as the last man.

Nothing though would be as ridiculous as the Tommy Elphick 'handball' at Withdean though

edna krabappel · Apr 8, 2015

Prince Monolulu said:
You DO know that one of these creative and well conceived, ridiculous prophecies is going to become a reality don't you?

View attachment 64434

Nothing we can say or do will change that. It's written into the laws of the game.

Everest · Apr 8, 2015

Ernest said:
91st minute 0-0 and Albion have a throw in near the Bournemouth box, Halford HURLS it in and the gust from the ball FELLS Wilson who is on the half way line, Pawsey still gives them a penalty despite him being 50 yards outside the box and to make matters worse sends off Calderon as the last man.

Nothing though would be as ridiculous as the Tommy Elphick 'handball' at Withdean though

Don't be ridiculous.

Being on the halfway line is not 50 yds outside the penalty area.

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The OFFICIAL Friday Night Penalty Prediction Thread