Do you charge your kids "keep"

jevs · Jan 4, 2015

Daughter is 16. She's a good kid and i'm very proud of her.

She's at college for 2 years studying travel and tourism. She also has several part time jobs including waitressing in he local, working in New Look and some cleaning for a friend. She has no travel expenses as she walks to college. She takes home around £300 a month

She does live at home but spends most nights at her boyfriends.

Presently, she doesn't pay us a penny in "keep". But i think she should contribute to the household...and my wife doesn't.

I earnt £40 a week as a 16 year old and paid my folks £10 a week.

My daughter spends her money on clothes, haircuts, new fingernails etc etc...she doesn't save a penny. I cook her dinners and buy all food, toiletries etc, she also has sky multiroom in her room and she does sod all around the house.

My parents spoil her rotten, they're saving up for her driving lessons, first car, insurance etc and have around £5k for that so there's no incentive for her to save.

I think she should be contributing around 15% of her wages per month.

What do you think ?

kevo · Jan 4, 2015

Yes, defo! I don't even know why you're asking. If she's 16 and working she should definitely contribute, even if only £50 a month or something.

willyfantastic · Jan 4, 2015

I personally wouldn't do it until they are at least 18.

If they go to Uni they aren't about. If they get a full-time job and still living at home? They can definitely pay

Change at Barnham · Jan 4, 2015

Perhaps take something off her as a token gesture to get her to start appreciating the value of money and the cost of living. Maybe take £10 a week and ring fence it to give it back to her at a later date. Being financially soft with her won't do her any favours.

Adsgull · Jan 4, 2015

I was always charged a third of my wages each month that included everything. That's from the moment I started work never do me any harm

mwrpoole · Jan 4, 2015

Assuming your still getting Child Benefit for her then no I don't think you should. However if you think you need to do something as a gesture, cancel the multi room and say if she wants it she'll have to pay for it.

Peter Grummit · Jan 4, 2015

If she's at College and still has a number of jobs to bring in £300 per month then she clearly works hard. It's not like she is just dossing around the house.

If you were struggling financially then I'd say yeah, get her to chip in. But given that you pay for Sky multiroom I suspect that's not the case. Why not get her to do more chores around the house by way of contribution?

PG

Crispy Ambulance · Jan 4, 2015

Yes, the eldest 2 each pay 25% of their take home pay towards household costs.

Pogue Mahone · Jan 4, 2015

Sounds like she's working her fingers to the bone. My 17 and 16 year old boys are both at BHASVIC, neither has a job, although both want one.

I give them an allowance. I will not charge them 'keep' until they are at least 18, and in a position where they can pay it.

Seems unfair to charge a 16 year old - I think you should just be proud of her for how hard she is working!

Pogue Mahone · Jan 4, 2015

I would make her do jobs around the house, though!

Hampster Gull · Jan 4, 2015

Sounds like a good girl. I would do a token amount

shwoody1 · Jan 4, 2015

mwrpoole said:
Assuming your still getting Child Benefit for her then no I don't think you should. However if you think you need to do something as a gesture, cancel the multi room and say if she wants it she'll have to pay for it.

sounds fair if you are receiving child benefit. If and when your not 20-25%

wellquickwoody · Jan 4, 2015

No ifs, no buts, you should make her pay something.

The longer life seems free, the less reason to budget and save for the future.

My first money was £21.50 take home per week on a government Youth Opportunity Scheme (YOPS), I gave my mum £10 every Friday.

Triggaaar · Jan 4, 2015

jevs said:
What do you think ?

Your daughter is making a fool of you, she clearly has no awareness of the sacrifices you've made for her. As a parent I know it won't be easy, but if you want the best for her future you should really kick her out.

Sorry, I've been arguing with Mustafa again - it brings out the worst in me.

Charge her a small amount, and put everything she gives you into savings for her to use when she needs it.

Frutos · Jan 4, 2015

Absolutely.

I was expected to contribute at least a token amount as soon as I started earning my own money, and did so willingly. If she's old enough to work, she's old enough to pay her way to at least some extent.

mr sheen · Jan 4, 2015

Charge it to her, give it her back as a lump sum when she moves out or goes to uni. Don't tell her that's what you're doing though. Unless you need it to keep her. Useful to get her in the habit of paying her way. I used to have to pay out a third of my earnings, even during a brief period on benefits.

Brovion · Jan 4, 2015

No. Our son's just moved back home after uni and is trying to get a full-time job in his field which is Music Technology (and there aren't that many as you can imagine). Whilst looking for some sort of career opening he's also formed his own record label (having released his stuff on other people's in the past) and he does some DJ sets when he can use his own material. None of this pays well, in fact when you factor in the equipment most of it costs him money. He's on Jobseekers and he does do some shifts in a coffee shop (the dole office sent him on a barista course), but again we're not talking lottery win money here.

My wife and I are happy to support him until he finds his feet. It's not as if he lies in bed until midday and then spends the next twelve hours playing video games, he's very conscientious. Whether we'll still feel like that in a year's time I don't know, but at the moment we're being supportive as we can see that he's trying to get on. He does walk the dogs occasionally!

Garage_Doors · Jan 4, 2015

I have 3 children, two in full time work and one at college but none of them earn enough so we don't ask for any contribution,
In fact we contribute to them buy getting them the're cars/insurances/taxes holidays etc, I'm sure there appreciate it when were old and need the help!

Lush · Jan 4, 2015

I reckon what most parents want is for their kids to grow up to be confident, financially independent adults. It sounds as if you've already done a great job. She's only 16, yet she's a full time student at sixth form/college, studying for a specific career and with several part-time jobs.

Most kids that age are asking their parents for money for clothes, haircuts, going out money etc - but she's paying for it all herself.

I'd wait until she's working full time or getting a student grant before you ask for rent money. I'd stop waiting on her hand and foot though. You don't have to cook all her meals or do her washing - and certainly don't clean her room! Tell her it's preparation for the day she has to do it herself.

Beach Hut · Jan 4, 2015

Pogue Mahone said:
Sounds like she's working her fingers to the bone. My 17 and 16 year old boys are both at BHASVIC, neither has a job, although both want one.

I give them an allowance. I will not charge them 'keep' until they are at least 18, and in a position where they can pay it.

Seems unfair to charge a 16 year old - I think you should just be proud of her for how hard she is working!

My 17 year old is at BHAVSIC as well and has no job so gets £50 a month plus paid phone. He can have more if required as and when. Eldest in the States and has around £300 off us a month to eat and live.

Personally I would only expect a contribution if education finished.

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