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supaseagull

Well-known member
Feb 19, 2004
9,609
The United Kingdom of Mile Oak
Just in...

Shares in KFC, McDonalds and chicken giant Nandos plummeted today after Brighton & Hove Albion’s Welsh assistant boss Nathan Jones announced that former Swansea City player and Dutch International Kemy Agustein was on a diet.

Rumours recently surfaced through Agustein’s Twitter account that a diet was now in place, when a picture of a large man in a Swansea shirt and a Ronald McDonald face mask was seen running around a cattle field shouting “onion rings, onion rings, onion rings” at a site in Coldean, near the Albion’s training ground in Falmer.

According to the Argus, Sources close to Agustein have refused to comment on this story, but have admitted that he had “gone quiet” on Twitter over recent days and that there are fears that the midfield maestro had eaten his Samsung Galaxy Note after surfing the internet and having came across a picture of a bargain bucket.

Meanwhile in other news, former Bristol Rovers striker Will Hoskins is again back on the treatment table for having broken a nail whilst in a fight with Tracey Obika…More in tomorrows early edition of the Argus
 


Uncle Spielberg

Well-known member
NSC Patreon
Jul 6, 2003
42,779
Lancing
2.6
 




Mellotron

I've asked for soup
Jul 2, 2008
31,722
Brighton
Considering Kemy looks in much better shape than last season this is odd timing.
 


Badger

NOT the Honey Badger
NSC Patreon
May 8, 2007
12,749
Toronto
Terrible
 








Guy Fawkes

The voice of treason
Sep 29, 2007
8,187
Just in...

Shares in KFC, McDonalds and chicken giant Nandos plummeted today after Brighton & Hove Albion’s Welsh assistant boss Nathan Jones announced that former Swansea City player and Dutch International Kemy Agustein was on a diet.

Rumours recently surfaced through Agustein’s Twitter account that a diet was now in place, when a picture of a large man in a Swansea shirt and a Ronald McDonald face mask was seen running around a cattle field shouting “onion rings, onion rings, onion rings” at a site in Coldean, near the Albion’s training ground in Falmer.

According to the Argus, Sources close to Agustein have refused to comment on this story, but have admitted that he had “gone quiet” on Twitter over recent days and that there are fears that the midfield maestro had eaten his Samsung Galaxy Note after surfing the internet and having came across a picture of a bargain bucket.

Meanwhile in other news, former Bristol Rovers striker Will Hoskins is again back on the treatment table for having broken a nail whilst in a fight with Tracey Obika…More in tomorrows early edition of the Argus

Very poor joke....However if you were to repeat it for severasl years perhaps it might become funny (what do you think Ernest?)
 






Dec 29, 2011
8,014
You made the mistake of not using random CAPITALISED words and not having the username Ernest. Apart from that it seems up to scratch.
 


The GIF dude

New member
Mar 22, 2013
202
Sidwell
Just in...

Shares in KFC, McDonalds and chicken giant Nandos plummeted today after Brighton & Hove Albion’s Welsh assistant boss Nathan Jones announced that former Swansea City player and Dutch International Kemy Agustein was on a diet.

Rumours recently surfaced through Agustein’s Twitter account that a diet was now in place, when a picture of a large man in a Swansea shirt and a Ronald McDonald face mask was seen running around a cattle field shouting “onion rings, onion rings, onion rings” at a site in Coldean, near the Albion’s training ground in Falmer.

According to the Argus, Sources close to Agustein have refused to comment on this story, but have admitted that he had “gone quiet” on Twitter over recent days and that there are fears that the midfield maestro had eaten his Samsung Galaxy Note after surfing the internet and having came across a picture of a bargain bucket.

Meanwhile in other news, former Bristol Rovers striker Will Hoskins is again back on the treatment table for having broken a nail whilst in a fight with Tracey Obika…More in tomorrows early edition of the Argus

Absolutely brilliant! :lolol: :lolol: :lolol:
 



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