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  1. #1

    The NOT guilty thread


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    What have you been accused of?

    Get this, walking home with the Mrs and another couple from the pub and we are all a bit squiffy. We walk past a late night garage and me and said couple dive in to get a Ginsters. Mrs stays outside, we come out and she is no where to be seen. Getting concerned we jog on to find her 1/2 mille ahead.

    When me gets home I gets the most almighty bollocking for letting her walk home alone.

    Over to the jury.
    DEL: Trig do you remember walking into that mind your head sign?
    TRIG: Yeah but in them days I couldn't read.

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    • #2
      #14/15 - 18/19 Goldstone1976's Avatar
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      Quote Originally Posted by El Abd's Head Slap View Post
      This quote is hidden because you are ignoring this member. Show Quote
      What have you been accused of?

      Get this, walking home with the Mrs and another couple from the pub and we are all a bit squiffy. We walk past a late night garage and me and said couple dive in to get a Ginsters. Mrs stays outside, we come out and she is no where to be seen. Getting concerned we jog on to find her 1/2 mille ahead.

      When me gets home I gets the most almighty bollocking for letting her walk home alone.

      Over to the jury.
      Kinda depends on two things. 1) did you explicitly tell her you were going into said establishment? 2) irrespective of the answer to 1), are you 100% totally sure that she knew that you were going into said establishment? If the answer to both questions is anything other than an unequivocal "yes"; you're to blame. Come to think of it, whatever the answer to any question is, you're to blame any way....
    • #3
      Members albion534's Avatar
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      Woman are always right.....fact

      :sigh:
    • #4

      Re: The NOT guilty thread


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      Quote Originally Posted by Goldstone1976 View Post
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      Kinda depends on two things. 1) did you explicitly tell her you were going into said establishment? 2) irrespective of the answer to 1), are you 100% totally sure that she knew that you were going into said establishment? If the answer to both questions is anything other than an unequivocal "yes"; you're to blame. Come to think of it, whatever the answer to any question is, you're to blame any way....
      Yes and yes and yes my fault for not chaining her to the petrol pump.
      DEL: Trig do you remember walking into that mind your head sign?
      TRIG: Yeah but in them days I couldn't read.
    • #5
      #14/15 - 18/19 Goldstone1976's Avatar
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      Quote Originally Posted by El Abd's Head Slap View Post
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      Yes and yes and yes my fault for not chaining her to the petrol pump.


      You think you've had it hard off her so far? Wait til she sees this thread.....
    • #6

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      Don't think you've got a leg to stand on, you know the rules...

      The female always makes the rules
      The rules are subject to change at any time without prior notification.
      No male can possibly know all the rules.
      If the female suspects the male know all the rules, she must immediately change some or all of the rules.
      The female is never wrong.
      If the female is wrong, it is due to a misunderstanding which was a result of something the male did or said wrong.
      The male must apologize immediately for causing said misunderstanding.
      The female may change her mind at any time.
      The male must never change his mind without the express written consent of the female.
      The female has every right to be angry or upset at any time.
      The male must remain calm at all times unless the female wants him to be angry or upset.
      The female must, under no circumstances, let the male know whether or not she wants him to be angry and/or upset.
      The male is expected to mind read at all times.
      Any attempt to document the rules could result in bodily harm.
      If the female has PMS, all the rules are null and void.
      The female is ready when she is ready.
      The male must be ready at all time.
      The male who doesn't abide by the rules can't take the heat, lacks backbone, and is a wimp.
    • #7
      Members papajaff's Avatar
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      Divorce her
    • #8
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      ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
    • #9
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      Quote Originally Posted by El Abd's Head Slap View Post
      This quote is hidden because you are ignoring this member. Show Quote
      What have you been accused of?

      Get this, walking home with the Mrs and another couple from the pub and we are all a bit squiffy. We walk past a late night garage and me and said couple dive in to get a Ginsters. Mrs stays outside, we come out and she is no where to be seen. Getting concerned we jog on to find her 1/2 mille ahead.

      When me gets home I gets the most almighty bollocking for letting her walk home alone.

      Over to the jury.
      Is that a euphemism for something? If it is I think I have cracked the mystery.
    • #10
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      Quote Originally Posted by El Abd's Head Slap View Post
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      Yes and yes and yes my fault for not chaining her to the petrol pump.
      Chaining her to the petrol pump mmm that's a new one must try it Leaded or unleaded ?

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