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Oh help me parenting gurus of NSC.



Stat Brother

Stat Brother

Well-known member
NSC Patron
Jul 11, 2003
73,664
West west west Sussex
8 year old jnr stat has been on a stealing and lying mission, over the last few weeks.
It all came to light a week ago, and so far no consequence has even 'pricked his bubble'.

So much so in fact he's carried on stealing from shops, as well as other thefts from around the house.


Long before getting to this point, 8 year old me, I would have taken one of the very few slaps that was handed out, in my yoof.

For lots of reasons I can't/don't want to 'solve the problem with violence', to adopted Jnr Stat, but it's sure as hell what I think he 'needs'.


Come on chaps I need some consequences that'll make him sit up and take notice.
 






Worthingite

Worthingite

Sexy Pete... :D
Sep 16, 2011
4,959
Worthing
give him a shopping list?!? :D

I got caught shoplifting a packet of sweets when i was little. The shop didn't care all that much, so after dragging me into the shop to apologise, they got the local bobby round to give me a sound rollocking. Worked an absolute treat, never stole again.,and, from what I gather, the local PCSO's actually enjoy doing that sort of thing (getting to kids early and stopping them from being hood rats in the future). I can guarantee that Stat Jnr's face when a "Policeman" turns up at the door will be a picture.

Then again, my parents were advocates of "tough love". My dad once stopped me from playing with matches when i was little, by pouring lighter fluid on his hand and setting fire to it. Shit me up big time.
 


Goldstone Rapper

Goldstone Rapper

Rediffusion PlayerofYear
Jan 19, 2009
14,865
BN3 7DE
Bit like with toy guns, better for him to get his stealing phase out of his system in his childhood now rather than trying to suppress it. He'll soon find a more refined way. If you disapprove of it now, it will only make it more attractive to him. His experience and enjoyment of stealing will remain unresolved (due to your disapproval), leading to him carrying on into adulthood.
 


Dick Head

Dick Head

⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
Jan 3, 2010
13,632
Quaxxann
Sanctions.
 




M

Mellor 3 Ward 4

Well-known member
Jul 27, 2004
9,799
saaf of the water
Goldstone Rapper said:
Bit like with toy guns, better for him to get his stealing phase out of his system in his childhood now rather than trying to suppress it. If you disapprove of it now, it will only make it more attractive to him. His enjoyment of stealing will remain unresolved (due to your disapproval), leading to him carrying on into adulthood.
Click to expand...

Sorry, but disagree. I can't see what's to be gained from condoning his behaviour.

Take something away from him that he likes a while, like football, or playstation. Also get a copper round to frighten him.
 


Stat Brother

Stat Brother

Well-known member
NSC Patron
Jul 11, 2003
73,664
West west west Sussex
Worthingite said:
give him a shopping list?!? :D

I got caught shoplifting a packet of sweets when i was little. The shop didn't care all that much, so after dragging me into the shop to apologise, they got the local bobby round to give me a sound rollocking. Worked an absolute treat, never stole again.,and, from what I gather, the local PCSO's actually enjoy doing that sort of thing (getting to kids early and stopping them from being hood rats in the future). I can guarantee that Stat Jnr's face when a "Policeman" turns up at the door will be a picture.

Then again, my parents were advocates of "tough love". My dad once stopped me from playing with matches when i was little, by pouring lighter fluid on his hand and setting fire to it. Shit me up big time.
Click to expand...
Right that's it then.

I was wondering how I make that step, but if it's welcomed I'm in.


Back in the day I really got to Moo-Ma Stat, sadly for me she was wearing solid Scholl sandals.
3 of them across the back of the legs and I never did whatever it was again, (or sit down for a while).

I just represented that to Jnr Stat whacking a solid cycling shoe onto the corner of the wooden shoe box.

Followed by pointing out as much as me and Mummy don't believe it's the answer we're bloody close, 'feel free to keep pushing'.


Back in solitary now, the Leicester game is highly unlikely.
 


K

KneeOn

Well-known member
Jun 4, 2009
4,695
Stat Brother said:
8 year old jnr stat has been on a stealing and lying mission, over the last few weeks.
It all came to light a week ago, and so far no consequence has even 'pricked his bubble'.

So much so in fact he's carried on stealing from shops, as well as other thefts from around the house.


Long before getting to this point, 8 year old me, I would have taken one of the very few slaps that was handed out, in my yoof.

For lots of reasons I can't/don't want to 'solve the problem with violence', to adopted Jnr Stat, but it's sure as hell what I think he 'needs'.


Come on chaps I need some consequences that'll make him sit up and take notice.
Click to expand...

Quick question, it's a bit personal - do you have another child that is more... problematic? Both me and my sister went through a phase like this. I did it around 12/13 for attention and remained a bit of a cock until 14/15 as a result of my parents attention being constantly focused on my troublesome sister who went through this phase from 12 until 16 - and was/is a shit still sometimes.

Otherwise PCSO. When i did it, i stole from the Co OP by my school until my friend got caught and he said he knew i was doing it but didn't catch me.

I bought a pack of revels and a pack of Polo's from the change i was given for the papers and a chat with an officer stopped me there and then. You say you don't want to resort to corporal punishment, i did get the odd smack on the bum/leg when i was REALLY out of line, but in this case, i wasn't.

Get the highest ranking uniformed police officer friend you can to have a word. See if they can't take him up the Custody suite for a tour. It might seem harsh to scare him like that but it does work.
 




Triggaaar

Triggaaar

Well-known member
Oct 24, 2005
50,167
Goldstone
When he's out one day, take everything he owns. Leave his room empty, and just explain he's been robbed. Let him see what the other side of stealing is like.
 




K

KneeOn

Well-known member
Jun 4, 2009
4,695
Mellor 3 Ward 4 said:
Sorry, but disagree. I can't see what's to be gained from condoning his behaviour.

Take something away from him that he likes a while, like football, or playstation. Also get a copper round to frighten him.
Click to expand...

Dare i say - steal it from him? Show him what it's like to be on the otherside of the fence?

I'm not alone in this idea i see!!
 




Goldstone Rapper

Goldstone Rapper

Rediffusion PlayerofYear
Jan 19, 2009
14,865
BN3 7DE
Mellor 3 Ward 4 said:
Sorry, but disagree. I can't see what's to be gained from condoning his behaviour.

Take something away from him that he likes a while, like football, or playstation. Also get a copper round to frighten him.
Click to expand...

Sorry, I was being mischievous with my post! :thumbsup:
 


Goldstone Rapper

Goldstone Rapper

Rediffusion PlayerofYear
Jan 19, 2009
14,865
BN3 7DE


madinthehead

madinthehead

I have changed this
Jan 22, 2009
1,752
Oberursel, Germany
Also went through a shoplifting phase when I was younger... Got caught, taken to school in a police car and parents were informed... So a police visit maybe the way forward, or failing that, if you know what he has taken and from where, make him go back and apologize...
 




upthealbion1970

upthealbion1970

bring on the trumpets....
NSC Patron
Jan 22, 2009
8,865
Woodingdean
Triggaaar said:
When he's out one day, take everything he owns. Leave his room empty, and just explain he's been robbed. Let him see what the other side of stealing is like.
Click to expand...

This all day long, and he has to earn his things back.

My boy was being a little shit aged 4, I came back from work one day to find mrs had emptied his room of all his toys into our room. This in combination with the naughty step was our preferred method.

Good luck SB, and you must be strong otherwise he will only get worse.
 


Man of Harveys

Man of Harveys

Well-known member
Jul 9, 2003
18,734
Brighton, UK
When he was five, a naughty Alfred Hitchcock was sent by his dad to be locked up in the local police station cells, to be told "that's what happens to naughty boys". It SHAT him up apparently and gave him a taste of what real fear is like. Just sayin'.
 


CheeseRolls

CheeseRolls

Well-known member
NSC Patron
Jan 27, 2009
5,946
Shoreham Beach
How has the stealing come to light ? Has he actually been caught in any of the shops ?

If not I would take him into his favourite one and introduce him to the staff as a thief and let them know they should not allow him in the shop without one of his parents.

Stealing around the house, is harder to deal with and you might have to ask what else is going in the life of an eight year old. Is this a cry for help and or attention ?
 


Stat Brother

Stat Brother

Well-known member
NSC Patron
Jul 11, 2003
73,664
West west west Sussex
KneeOn said:
Quick question, it's a bit personal - do you have another child that is more... problematic? Both me and my sister went through a phase like this. I did it around 12/13 for attention and remained a bit of a cock until 14/15 as a result of my parents attention being constantly focused on my troublesome sister who went through this phase from 12 until 16 - and was/is a shit still sometimes.
Click to expand...
He's got a little sister how can be quite horrid, she's firey and heart on her sleeve, with bouts of extreme violence.
Very close to being statemented at school, but is so blooming bright it's hoped she can work it out, and does show signs of improvement.

The thing is while all this is going on Jnr Stat loves it (and must be the catalyst for most of her behaviour) because he NEEDS to be little Mr Perfect, the best/first/quickest etc, and win everything.

Daughter Stat has had her longest period of 'normality', about 4 weeks, and he's hating it, his secret stash has been found, but as said he still thinks he's The King of Perfect World, inhabitant 1.
 




Stat Brother

Stat Brother

Well-known member
NSC Patron
Jul 11, 2003
73,664
West west west Sussex
CheeseRolls said:
How has the stealing come to light ? Has he actually been caught in any of the shops ?

If not I would take him into his favourite one and introduce him to the staff as a thief and let them know they should not allow him in the shop without one of his parents.

Stealing around the house, is harder to deal with and you might have to ask what else is going in the life of an eight year old. Is this a cry for help and or attention ?
Click to expand...

We took him to return the stuff he'd stolen from the vets, having told them first, he left with a hug from the practice nurse :eyesroll:
 




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