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Childish rhymes - Please contribute



Bolton va va

Active member
Nov 20, 2012
374
Those who fight & run away, live to fight another day,

Those who stay & take a chance, get taken home in an ambulance.
 








AmexRuislip

Trainee Spy 🕵️‍♂️
Feb 2, 2014
33,727
Ruislip
There once was a ref named Atkinson,
Who travelled over the river Severn
Acting like a f*cktard,
Giving Dale a red card.
Angering the Albion following,
He proceeds to allow Cardiff winning.
 




Albion my Albion

Well-known member
NSC Patreon
Feb 6, 2016
17,625
Indiana, USA
There once was a man from Nantucket...but the stories about him were a gross exaggeration.

There was a young man from Nantucket
Whose dick was so long he could suck it.
He said with a grin
As he wiped off his chin,
"If my ear was a c*nt I would f*ck it."


Since you opened up the Nantucket lines.

They were started by a Princeton University professor in 1902. The f*ck it rhyme came later.
 




Albion my Albion

Well-known member
NSC Patreon
Feb 6, 2016
17,625
Indiana, USA
The variant we had was :

I'm popeye the sailor man
I live in a caravan
Sleep with my Granny and tickle her faxxy
I'm Popeye the sailor man

I'm popeye the sailor man
I live in a dustbin (garbage in the US) can
I like to go swimmin' with bow-legged women
I'm popeye the sailor man.
(Toot! Toot!)
 




Sirnormangall

Well-known member
Sep 21, 2017
2,937
My friend Billy's got a ten foot willy and he showed it to the girl next door,
She thought it was a snake, So she hit it with a rake, And now it's only four foot four

Next.....
I think I saw Billy on pornhub the other night.
 




Jahooli

Well-known member
Feb 12, 2008
1,292
Seeing as it's nearly Christmas.

While shepherds washed their socks at night
All eating fish and chips
The angel of the lord came down
And charged them three and six..

(doesn't work since Britain went decimal)
 






SwedishSonna

Active member
Aug 9, 2005
508
Newcastle upon Tyne
olly olly olly, tits in the trolley, balls in the biscuit tin, sitting on the grass with his finger up his arse, playing with his dingalingaling... usually sung to someone called oliver haha

A variation sung in schools in Lewes...

Olly olly olly, tits in a trolley, balls in a biscuit tin. Man in the bath, finger up his arse, balls go dingalingaling.

Different up and down the country I 'spose.
 


Godstar

Active member
Jan 18, 2012
180
Sodom..or is it Gomorrah!
Hitler has only got one ball
The other is in the Albert hall
HIs mother the dirty bugger
Cut it off when he was younger
Hitler has only got one ball
The other is in the Albert hall
HIs mother the dirty bugger
Cut it off when he was younger

That’s the version I used to sing but my dad used to sing:
Hitler has only got one ball
Goerings is very small
Himmler was very similar
And Goebbals had no balls at all
 




Two Professors

Two Mad Professors
Jul 13, 2009
7,617
Multicultural Brum
There was a young man from Rhyll
Who swallowed a dynamite pill
His balls expired
His a**e backfired
And his pri**k ended up in Redhill

or

There was a young man from Calcutta
Who took a peek through a shutter
But all he could see
Was up to her knee
And the a**e of the bloke who was up 'er
 


AIT76

The wisdom of a fool
Jul 29, 2004
444
There was a gay man from Khartoum
Took a lesbian up to his room
They argued all night
About who had the right
To do what, using which, and to whom.
 





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