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you can't marmalade your dick up a girls bum? or Conserves are a lot like jam but are made from combining fruit and sometimes raisins, nuts, and coconut. Marmalades are usually made of citrus fruits and contain pieces of the peel suspended in a transparent jelly. Fruit butter utilizes the pulp...

Sounds really easy and satisfying to make. A real sense of achievement. I'd probably burn down the kitchen and lose an eye in the process sadly.