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It's a fair point. But: if Stoke-on-Trent is the armpit, then Croydon is the sweaty crack between the buttocks, surely?

Don't fall for the myth that the Premier League is all about glamour. Yes, you have United, City, Arsenal, Chelsea etc. But godforsaken crap-holes are certainly not an exclusive preserve of the Football League. The delights of Watford, Leicester, Sunderland, Southampton, Stoke and West...