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who's a mug? im certainly curious, but the tone of your post suggests there *must* be a real reason that is being hidden. its angry, grieving responce to a loss: you basically want someone to blame. my point is only that as we dont know the "real reason", we dont know that there is someone to...

seems like you already made up your mind what the "real reasons" are, so any further information would be superfluious, no?