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A couple or three years ago I was sat in Barclays Bank, George Street Hove, when I realised that Jesus Christ himself was standing in the queue at the reception desk. The second coming was in the shape of our beautiful bearded and wavy-haired right-back from Basqueland. His senses picked up on...

Oh crap - have I been hating the wrong person for all these years? (I'm sure it was against Fulham though.........?)

Well done, I seem to remember he was the violent little scrote that took out Liam Bridcutt at the Amex, when the referee bottled his red card.