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How dare you. That's my great aunt Maud, a fan since 1898 starting with Brighton United FC. it's the arthritis that prevents her from clapping and standing. She's also deaf, so can't hear your noise, so unfortunately you are lumbered with her until she meets her maker.

Too simplistic a dichotomy. I know a family who are 1901ers, who have watched almost every Albion game home and away for 40 years, including every visit to Carlisle, Darlington, Hartlepool, Plymouth. They had always stayed to the bitter end. In contrast, at the Amex they always leave at...