"You've got the power to know you're indestructable" crooned bequiffed Tonu Hadley on Spandau Ballet's scampi and chips brigade classic Gold.
Well having stood in front of a moving car this evening I know this to be palpably untrue and am currently in intensive care.
I've got a brand new combine harvester and I'll give you the key? I mean let a women go out riding on your farm equipment just because you want to get your leg over? Have farmers reached the 20th century regarding treatment of women yet?
Lionel Richie claimed oh what a feeling when you're dancing on the ceiling. Well Mr Richie the only feeling I had was the one of agony as I fell head first to the floor.