I have to say that I'm humbled by the way that you're coping with your situation. Your strength of character is amazing and if anyone deserves to beat this vile disease, it's you.
Keep fighting and stay positive. A friend of mine had throat cancer, went through chemo, radiotherapy and surgery and won. It can be beaten. He's a hypnotherapist and swears by what the brain can do if focused positively.
I know exactly how you must be feeling. They say time heals, but, in all honesty, it doesn't. Emotions cannot, just, be terminated when life is. Keep strong, your kids will need you now.
A friend of mine had a lump on his neck, which his GP treated with antibiotics. It didn't go away so he was sent for a biopsy, and was subsequently told that the growth was benign. The same day he and his wife were setting off on holiday, in a great mood, when the consultant phoned and said that...