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I would have advised 'heads or tails' but these days who carries cash?

But it's not an 'elephant in the room' either - the elephant has already emerged but is being ignored. The 'n****r in the woodpile' has yet to be revealed.

There are no other English phrases I can think of that describe an obscure factor or a concealed motive quite as well as "n****r in the woodpile", so for a 60 year-old woman to blurt it out is wrong but forgiveable if used in a specific context. However, there's nothing hidden or concealed...