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So the Sauce are as good as down. Somerset vs Hampshire at Taunton next week. We're still guaranteed to be outside the bottom two whatever the result. If Hants win that one, then we beat Somerset at Hove we'll be safe regardless of what happens in our last match vs Yorkshire. Therefore...

Alistair McGowan, Charles Dance, Edward Elgar, Stanley Baldwin, Basil D'Oliveira and King John...your boys took ONE HELL of a beating!

It looks like it's about to piss down. In Steyning.

Shantry back in the pantry, 1 wicket needed, rain approaching.

No doubt the appropriately-named Leach will cling on until at least tea.

Cox out!!!!!!!

I'm no homophobe but I find the sight of Cox wagging positively sickening.

50 partnership for the 7th wicket now up for the Sauce. We're going to f**k this up :(

We try and refrain from using the "V-word" on this thread, thank you.

Golf-mungus! With Yorkshire about to wrap up the title and Durham safe from relegation they've really "mailed in" this performance. The beach beckons...

Vince shouldn't have bothered taking out his bat, a plate and a napkin would have sufficed. 47-1, Pringles and plenty of Onions on offer - om nom nom.

No chance, it's Carberry but it might as well be Carvery the way these openers are tucking into the Durham bowling

Chalk up 500-510, then have 15 minutes at them before tea.

Hants 28-0 - it's in the bag. Their cucumber sandwiches will be tasting mighty fine at tea.

Sussex will be looking to milk ALL available bonus points, so will almost certainly continue batting towards 400 after lunch. I agree that controlled aggression until tea should have us with a lead of 300-odd, enabling the captain to set some aggressive fields. I think we need the insurance of...

Realistically, the draw is our only hope.

They probably think their 210 is a mediocre score, but with our batting it's a mountain. The Sauce will be in again shortly after tea.

I pity those with tickets for Day 3. This truly is the Battle of Batfliddery.

Cometh the hour, cometh the woman. Well done Katie!

Nailbiter. The Somerset collapse makes things interesting.