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"When Rohan Ince goes to The Amex, he gets the pie he ordered EVERY time" is an original one - some bloke called Mendoza tweeted it. How about "When Rohan Ince gets the train home after a game he always gets a seat, there is a complimentary refreshment trolley service and it takes him straight...

I am sure that we have seen or heard many of them before but they still made me smile. Not clever enough to paste a link here, you'll just have to hunt for them.