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I've got a mouse and he hasn't got a house, I don't know why I call him Gerald. He's getting rather old, but he's a good mouse. It's hard to know what to make of that ..

The fading chorus of Adam and the Ants "Stand and Deliver" I remember being a hot topic of discussion in my Smash Hits reading days. Some one suggested that "Cwa Cwa Dandiddly" (or whatever it was they were singing) was in fact a derivative of a military command "Come on, stand easily", i.e...

Do you live in Notting Hill?

Tusk. Tusk? Why tusk? What's that got to do with the rest of the song?

Did he not also mention the missus "polishing the glasses and pulling out the cork". This suggests a degree of poshness, but if you think about it in a little more depth, would Mr and Mrs Posh really be drinking fancy wine after midnight? I've never quite made my mind up where Paul Weller lies...

There are some songs that I have grown up with. From time to time their lyrics have struck me as a bit odd, but I have never really questioned them. They are the tapestry of my life and beyond question. However, from time to time I get to thinking "what on earth are you on about?". Today I...