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Everyone's clearly very excited about the new shirt and who could blame them. It's like Christmas morning. Building up expectations preposterously, then having the results fall even slightly short: this is all going into my football-related sitcom btw, if I ever sit down to write it. I'm...

Now THAT's a shirt. Why wouldn't anyone buy of them instead? So much more stylish, classier. And without all that puerile build-up bullsh1t.