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Rooney? Not in this lifetime.

No. No it's not. A victory is scoring more GOAlS than the other team. I can PM you the rules if you'd like? Roll on Scottish independence eh. That'll make you better at football...at least that's what the SNP will be claiming tomorrow.

I know. He looks like a different player from the hardworking flairniac we saw in his Palace days! Mind you. If Calderon was a Jocko he would have bagged a couple tonight.

****ing Zaha. Step over, step over,dive, run to the corner send the cross too deep and repeat.