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Well he was wrong.

In preparing a witty reply, I googled for pictures of the world's fattest woman in underwear. But the results were so upsetting that I can't bring myself to share it now. Now I also have to fear what kind of advertising Google are going to feed me in future.

I'm not surprised, you're halfway to Scotland.

I once applied for a job in London and got told by the bloke that he was interested but I'd have to shave the beard before he would take me away for "business trips". Lost my interest in the job rapidly. But come to think of it, at least he didn't want me to wear a dress.

No, but I heard they deal in Tat.

Tatprof. Enough said.