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And usually by the Center Midfield general who is in acres of space about 10 yards from you but is blowing out his arse after making a 15 yard track back.

After yet another failed attack, "Jog back lads, rest when you get there" Up yours mate, I've just run almost the entire length of the pitch chasing a complete lost cause, if you think I'm running anywhere for the next 5 minutes you are very much mistaken.

The shout of "AWAY" is probably the one that pissed me off the most. What the hell else do you think I'm going to do with it, if I can be arsed to "get my head on it" with the hangover headache I always had on Sundays.

I think every game of Sunday football I ever played contained some, if not all, of these phrases. I do not miss it in the slightest.