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We will. We are on the up. We may yet get there this season. But I'm not going to glue a celebratory balloon to my forehead on the offchance we might. AND I will probably be dead before you, so my stoicism and restraint are even more measured. I am serene. I will not be wearing a 'ha ha citeh' T...

This. "Pre-order your embroidered Wembley shirt by tomorrow" email received from the club. Anyone getting a 'FA Cup Semi Finalists' tattoo? On their face? ??? Or a bottle of this: