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Three guys are captured by cannibals after their ship wrecked on a remote island. The cannibals say: "Take 10 of your favorite fruit and come back." The first man comes over with apples. The cannibals tell him to shove them up his butt, and if he makes no noise he lives. After the second apple...

I was at a job interview today. The interviewer said to me, "On your CV, it says that you are a man of mystery." I said, "That's correct." He said, "Would you like to elaborate?" I said, "No."

A woman brings eight-year-old Johnny home and tells his mother that he was caught playing doctors and nurses with Mary, her eight-year-old daughter. Johnny's mother says, "Let's not be too harsh on them... they are bound to be curious about sex at that age." "Curious about sex?" replies Mary's...