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Downhill skiing --> Down Bill skiing Competitors race down the pile of money paid by the UK to be in the EU.

Football --> Footbail Competiors take it in turns to bail out someone who has commited vile crimes and been caught but yet to be tried in court. The winner of the game is the person who manages to secure bail for the worst offender, judged either in terms of numbers of crimes commited or the...

Syncronized Swimming --> syncronized Skimming Competitors in teams of 2 have to skim stones on a lake in unison and are judged by the timing of the skips being the same as well as the distance of each skip matching as well as the total distance travelled. The winners are the team that manages...

Volleyball --> Valleyball Competitors are driven out to an unknown valley and then have to invent ways in which to move a ball across from one side of the valley to the other without it or them touching the ground on the way. they are only allowed to use the things that they find locally and...

100 metres --> 100 mitres A race over where competitors sprint it out to see who is the quickest to run over 100 ceremonial Bishop head-dresses. Lots of other varients on this exist iincluding ones like the 200 mitres, 400 mitres and the 10,000 mitres

Giant Slalom --> Giant Shalom. Competitors are blindfolded and have to correctly identify the tallest Jewish individual from a line up and they have to judge this purely from the sound of their voice as those taking part in the line up say the word Shalom.

Rugby --> Rigby Competitors offer bungs and other perks to judges in order to secure a major sporting event in their country. FIFA are the current reigning champions and look like they will be hard to depose any time soon.

Dicsus --> Discuss. Competitors talk about the science involved in throwning objects and what can affect the distances that could be achieved

Hammer throwing --> Hamper throwing. A summer event originating from when families were out on a picnic and the heavens opened meaning they had to throw their picnic spread back into the hamper and then throw it into the back of their car before seeking shelter.