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Which actually inspires me: a) Dress all in black or all in white with a matching, logo-free baseball cap or rounded hat and go as a pawn. b) Dress all in pink with a matching, logo-free baseball cap with pink sticky up barbs on it made out of papier mache and go as a prawn. c) Go naked with...

And under no circumstances get caught with a pawn stash

PAHAHAHAHAHAHA! You COULD do that if you wanted. But here's what will happen. Six years and three months later there will be a marital disagreement over a can of beans. She will storm off in a huff and not speak to Crodo for DAYS. This will puzzle him greatly. Eventually - having said she was...

Peppa Pig - just hope Dave C doesn't turn up with his Oxford chums. Or spend all night looking up the ladies' dresses and say you've come as a Peeping Tom.