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I love the way this has turned into the Four Yorkshireman sketch. 'Going to the Goldstone on your own at 7. You were tied t' apron strings. I was born at twenty to three on a Saturday. I cut the cord, slapped the midwife, nicked an ambulance, then parked up int south west corner. I were there...

I've told Margaret and Ethel about your pending transfer. Much excitement. Ethel needed a stiff whisky after I showed her your wedding photo. 'Are they still together ?' she asked. I said you were happily married but she seems to have turned carefree in her old age. Arthur seemed to show a lot...

I spoke to a work colleague a while back who couldn't believe that I was walking to school on my own by the age of seven. If I had turned up at Junior School accompanied by my Mum it would have been the ultimate humiliation. 'Mum, I'm EIGHT for crying out loud. This is so embarrassing'

You would have had a lot of objections from and me me mates back in the day at that !