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Or to the tune of My Old Man's a Dustman: Mitoma's a fast man, He has some fast man legs He runs at slow defenders And hits the back of the net! I imagine it starting it off slowly before repeating 2 or 3 times getting faster each time until it becomes an incoherent mess...

Oooh, Tony do you know what he's worth? Oooh, Evan you're the best on Earth. They say for Evan, goals come first! Oooh, Evan you're the best on Earth Oooh, Evan you're the best on Earth!